winsomeICARUS [blog]

Consumed Media in 2011

2011-12-30T12:37:00.000-05:00

I clearly dropped the ball on this list. I had just bragged that I keep track of everything I read and watch, too. My New Year's Eve weekend is off to a lousy start, so I'll be quick: This year I survived two rounds of bedbug infestations, several long-term mice infestations, and a barrage of terrible, terrible roommates. But everything is still pretty awesome.

My favorite books this year were Swamplandia!, Model Home, Please Look After Mom, and Nightwoods. My favorite movies were The Artist and Attack the Block.

I have some goals for 2012. When I have some progress, I'll try to update here.

See 2009 and 2010.

A Dirty Shame
Down By Law
The Duchess
Louie
Louie C.K.: Chewed Up
Parks and Recreation (Season One)
Parks and Recreation (Season Two)
The Young Victoria

Eating and Drinking In New Orleans

2011-07-31T22:01:00.000-04:00

I went to New Orleans last weekend for Tales of the Cocktail, a conference dedicated to drinking. This year you got into the conference by signing up for a session. From there, you could explore numerous activities and tasting rooms throughout the week. I made an effort to take copious notes in the three days I was there. Here is what I imbibed and consumed:

NEW ORLEANS: WHAT I DRANK

All drinks were in a smaller cup and provided at the conference, unless otherwise noted

St. Germain Cocktails (3; probably the “full” size)

10 Cane Swizzle

10 Cane + Coca-Cola

Cointreau Cup (full size)

Ramos' Gin Fizz (full size, Sazerac Bar at the Roosevelt Hotel)

Bloody Mary (full size, but only a few sips, Carousel Bar at the Hotel Monteleone)

Coffee + Kahlua and soy milk (medium coffee)

Hendrick's gin and tonic

rum + ice cream

a third, undocumented, Hendrick's beverage

Sailor Jerry rum root beer float

Sailor Jerry rum bacon bloody mary (only a few sips, confusing flavor profile)

Nectar soda (non-alcoholic, WII Museum's Soda Shop)

Leblon's coconut sorbet

Root and Snap phosphate (sample, Sodatender or Barjerk panel)

Unidentified grapefruit and lime mess (sample, Drinking On Deadline)

Second unidentified in every way (sample, Drinking on Deadline)

Pernod's absinthe drink (FULL SIZE, WHOO)

Pernod's Green Beast (FULL SIZE, WHOO)

Campari's negroni (Full Size, only 1/3)

Champagne Cocktail (Sylvain's)

A LOT of water

This is butter.

NEW ORLEANS: WHAT I ATE

This is alligator. I only tried it.

The Felix Special (half shrimp, half oyster po' boy, Felix's)

Pecan waffle, hashbrowns, coffee, pecan waffle (3 bites; The Camellia Grill)

Barbecue shrimp (Mr. B's)

Fried Chicken (Sylvain)

Beignets, coffee (Cafe du Monde)

Visiting New Orleans also satisfied my goal of traveling South. I don't think I like the ways of genteel people, but I enjoyed my time in New Orleans and look forward to going back next year.

Allow Me To Introduce Ladies Vivian and Diane

2011-06-05T00:14:00.000-04:00

Providing a small investment to Bust at the Maker Faire last summer was a great idea. The magazine often has cocktails and recipes, plus book reviews, in-depth interviews, and smart articles about pop culture. I think I paid $5, which is perhaps unfair, because I often feel like I learn a lot with each issue. This month I learned about carnivorous plants.

Carnivorous plants, which are found in bogs (and in some cases, the desert) in the wild, have adapted to an environment where the soil does not provide nutrients. These plants have adapted by eating insects (and not raw meat or delicious children, which I once feared). When planted, horticulturists recommend that the plants be potted in peat moss or sphagnum. Some plants, like the Venus Fly Trap, need only a few insects a year.

I like to boast that I know a lot about gardening. This is, however, not entirely true. I know a lot about planting over 100 tulip, hyacinth, and lily bulbs. I know a lot about dead heading petunias, and I know how to kill beautiful purple and hot pink daisies. I know how to turn on a hose and drench tomato plants, and how to prune bushes and shrubs. I know how to spread much! I do not actually know a lot about gardening.

I may have overstated my prowess when spring began, and I may have convinced myself that I'm a great amateur gardener when I planted marigolds, a tomato plant, and purple daisies. Then I planted lavender (because bees and butterflies love it), and a small pink cactus. I have dropped the daisies and cactus (on separate occasions), but have yet to kill any of my botanicals with finality.

And this is good, because today I bought two carnivorous plants. Let the record show I have never boasted to know much of anything about bug-eating botanicals.

Bust's Megan O. Andersen convinced me easily. Andersen calls her skin a "neon 'all-you-can-eat-buffet' sign for mosquitoes" and says she uses the plants to keep the pests "at bay." I have my own mosquito problem, and tend to attract the biting bugs more than most (and definitely have a bigger problem with bites than my oblivious, unbitten floormates).

Andersen provides information about the main plants, and where they do best (window sills, patios), and how to take care of them. So naturally, I went on the hunt for the plant that, Andersen "enjoy[s] being overlooked in the winter" and feasts on mosquitoes.

It took some work, but today I bought the last Butterwort, or Pinguicula, the Brooklyn Botanical Garden had. I also like that the Butterwort is rosette-shaped (it makes it look like an otherwise very boring plant) and produces beautiful purple flowers.

I was surprised by how small the plant was, so I invested a second plant for my window sill. I bought Sarracenia, which like the sun, "are happiest in sitting water," and catch bugs in their cup-like appendages. I like how pretty they are when they grow larger. I like how they're reddish and regal.

From the plants' labels:

BUTTERWORTS
Pinguicula sp.

Butterworts lure, capture and digest insects by coating their leaves with a sweet-smelling sticky glue. Gnats, mosquitoes, and other small insects get stuck and their bodily fluids are then absorbed by the plant.

PITCHER PLANTS
Sarracenia sp.

Pitcher plants lure and capture insects by producing a sweet nectar which attracts and immobilizes their prey. The hairs on the lip of the pitcher grow down, so the insect slips, falls in the cup, and then is digested.

AWESOME.

I hope the low maintenance and general stigma (asking for these plants has irritated a lot of plant specialists across the city) makes me look like a bad ass botanist.

Meet Wilbur

2011-03-23T23:16:00.002-04:00

This is Wilbur, my ukulele. He's a patient fellow. I haven't picked him up in earnest yet, but he's survived the arduous journey from Maryland to Brooklyn, and doesn't mind that we haven't really bonded yet. Joey found him in a thrift store, had read about my goal to learn the ukulele, and dropped him off at my parents' house. (I may be taking this naming-your-instrument thing too far.)

I know nothing about playing stringed instruments. Frets and chords are new to me, and this explanation from soyouwanna.com overwhelmed me:

The Ab6 or A flat sixth chord is most commonly played in the key of Ab. While playing in the key of Ab, the Ab6 chord will normally follow the A chord.

Of course, going to Borders for a book yielded an armful of discounted childrens' books and cookbooks. Thankfully, I have the Internet. I asked Facebook for suggestions. A friend of my sister's has put me in touch with a friend who can (possibly) give me some lessons (maybe), and a friend from home has encouraged me by averring that it is very easy.

The Internet is also full of videos and articles (and Web sites), including this one:

I'm going to watch this at least a hundred times. It's only eight minutes long, and I don't feel confused or over my head. Jody Kamisato is a patient and enthusiastic man.

I'd me remiss if I didn't research the ukulele at length, so it might be awhile until you hear about Wilbur again, but know that my summer has upgraded from porch drinking to porch drinking and ukulele playing. (Even if I don't, the idea is soothing. It snowed today.)

(I meant to post this several weeks ago.)

2011-02-28T22:35:00.000-05:00

Rooster Kills Man in Cockfight

...Poyo.

Screw you, FX

2011-02-10T17:52:00.002-05:00

Seriously. I can't afford cable. What a bunch of baloney.

Un Tour De Manege

2011-01-29T10:48:00.000-05:00

UN TOUR DE MANEGE from alexis liddell on Vimeo.

Wow.

(Via Gizmodo.)

WORDS I LEARNED AT WORK: LOWERY

2011-01-04T20:07:00.000-05:00

This caught my eye while I was looking up something else:

LOWERY: DARK AND CLOUDY

Not as fun as fussbudget, but it will do when I want to pretend I'm Anne Shirley.

2KX, In Review (Sorta)

2011-01-01T12:15:00.000-05:00

Happy New Year, dearest Internet!

I saw a lot of naysaying about 2010 on the Internet—blogs, Facebook, Twitter, etc.—and I'd like to respectfully disagree. (And where was that naysaying all of the years I complained? Hmmmmm?) I had a pretty great 2010 (though it was not without its own special stress and angst). In fact...

I finally wrote out everything I wanted to do...and posted it online. (To less ridicule than expected.)
I learned to embroider, use a sewing machine, and quilt. And then I made a quilt. A big one!
I went to two roller derby exhibitions. (One in DC and one in Hagerstown.)
I saw Ted Leo twice in one day.
I got a job, after nine months of unemployment.
I move to New York.
I found a place to live, in Brooklyn. In the cutest, charmingest, nicest, house near the subway that ever was.
I developed a steadier gate for running at full speed.
I started eating fried fish, and realized I might like it.
I started watching Bones and realized I'm obsessed with it. (Thanks, Js.)
My niece, the cutest, smartest, sweetest baby ever, was born.
I taught myself to make more cocktails.
I spent a long afternoon in the American Museum of Natural History.
I spent a short afternoon in the Museum of Sex.
I took my first Bolt Bus ride. I've taken so many rides that I earned a free trip. (Which I then took, and realized how great fried fish is with curry sauce.)
YOU GUYS, I GOT A JOB AND MOVED TO NEW YORK.
I got a passport.
I shoveled so much snow that I cried. That's bad, but it was an accomplishment. an accomplishment that led to a vow to never shovel again. (And because I wasn't in Brooklyn for the blizzard, I haven't had to.)
I walked miles and miles and miles every day. I looked up routes on maps and said, "That's only a mile and a half each way. That's fine."
I rode a bicycle from Bushwick to DUMBO. (AND BACK.)
I discovered liege waffles, first in DC, and then in New York. I then committed a lifelong love for Waffles & Dinges.
I went to the Central Park zoo.
I toured the NBC studios.
I started doing yoga.
I threw a yard sale. A yard sale so epic that I invited my aunt, who lives in Indiana, to help us manage it. The yard sale was a bust, so we donated most of it. (Our adventures were not a bust.)
I helped host a baby shower!
I started Anne of Green Gables. (I started book three, Anne of the Island yesterday.)
I learned and perfected Korean pancakes.
I ate a lot of Korean food, having discovered my love for it in 2009.
I watched a lot of Lifetime.
I joined a knitting group!
I made a 13+-layer cake.
I crossed the Brooklyn Bridge...several times.
And yesterday, I opened a Roth IRA. It wasn't on my "life list" but I've been meaning to open an IRA for a long time. And I did it! YAY.

It's a lot of small, exciting things. This year I'm going to Oregon. Next weekend I'm going to the Guggenheim, and hopefully I'll take the No Pants Ride later this month.

Today I'm going to see Somewhere at the Angelika Theatre, and then I might buy tea in a cafe I loved when I was in high school. I used to fantasize that I'd pop in whenever I felt like it. In 2010 my life became what I hoped it would be when I was 17. Sometimes that's been overwhelming, or disappointing, but mostly it's just been comforting.

Happy New Year. I hope your 2011 is as satisfying as my 2010.

NEW SERIES!

2011-01-01T10:20:00.002-05:00

My friend Jane asked me to start a new blog featuring the new words I learn at my job, where I more or less play a more serious game of Scrabble or Bananagrams every day. Since I have too many blogs (), I'll take care of that here.

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU, AM I RIGHT?

To inaugurate this series, I present... FUSSBUDGET

From my parents' copy of Webster's New World Dictionary: One who complains often about unimportant matters.

At work it was likened to Lucy from Peanuts.

Consumed Media in 2kx

2011-01-01T08:45:00.000-05:00

Every movie I see, book I read, and television I devour in 2010. (See 2009 here.)

50 Dead Men Walking

Adventureland

Amelia
Anne of Green Gables by L.M. Montgomery
Anne of Avonlea by L.M. Montgomery

Asterios Polyp by David Mazzucchelli

Amreeka
National Lampoon's Bag Boy
Be More Chill by Ned Vizzini

Bloodroot by Amy Greene

Bones (Season One)

Bones (Season Two)

Bones (Season Three)

Bones (Season Four)

Bones (Season Five)

The Bridges of Madison County

Brothers (US)

Buffy The Vampire Slayer (Season Two; via Hulu)

Buffy The Vampire Slayer (Season Three; via Hulu)

The Butcher and the Vegetarian: One Woman's Romp Through a World of Men, Meat, and Moral Crisis by Tara Austen Weaver

Capitalism: A Love Story

Chew Vol. I: Taster's Choice by John Layman and Rob Guillory

Chew Vol. II: International Flavor by John Layman and Rob Guillory

Chiggers by Hope Larson

Clash of the Titans (2010)

Cleaving: A Story of Marriage, Meat, and Obsession by Julie Powell

Coco Before Chanel

Couple's Retreat

Date Night
Death at a Funeral

Despicable Me

Dinner for Schmucks
Easy A
Empire Falls by Richard Russo

Fast and Furious (or as I call it, The Faster The Furiouser)

The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls

The Hangover
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by J.K. Rowling
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix by J.K. Rowling

The Help

How I Met Your Mother Season Three

How I Met Your Mother Season Four

The Hurt Locker

I'm Reed Fish

The Invention of Lying

Iron Man 2

It's Complicated

It's Kind of a Funny Story
It's Kind of a Funny Story by Ned Vizzini

Kitchen Confidential (via Hulu)

Liar by Justine Larbalestier

Like Me: Confessions of a Heartland Country Singer by Chely Wright
Lottery Ticket

Love Happens

The Lovely Bones

Lorna's Silence

Make Way For Tomorrow
Mary and Max

The Messenger
Morbid Curiosity: The Disturbing Demises of the Famous and Infamous by Alan W. Petrucelli
Morning Glory

Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro
Never Let Me Go (2010)

New Moon

Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian

Penelope

Punch-Drunk Love
Red Hook Road by Ayelet Waldman

Role Models by John Waters

The Runaways
A Serious Man

She's Out of My League (review)

Sherlock Holmes
Scott Pilgrim vs. the World

Skins (Volume One)

Skins (Volume Two)

The Social Network

St. Trinian's
The Stepfather (2009)

Step Up 3D

Taking Woodstock

Triumph by Caroly Jessop
True Grit

Up In the Air

Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen

The Whale: In Search of Giants of the Sea by Philip Hoare
Winter's Bone

Youth in Revolt

Zombieland

Shows in 2010

2010-12-31T12:00:00.052-05:00

Shows in 2010

JANUARY
23:: Super Art Fight (Ottobar)

FEBRUARY
19:: Dan Deacon (Ottobar)
27:: MONSTER JAM: Freestyle Mania (1st Mariner Arena)

MARCH
6:: DC Roller Girls (DC Armory)
16:: Alkaline Trio (Recher)
21:: David Bazan and Headlights (Ottobar)
26:: Ben Folds and a Piano (9:30)

APRIL
2:: Nada Surf (9:30)
8:: Ted Leo and the Pharmacists (9:30)
20:: Mastadon (Rams Head Live)

MAY
6:: BSO at Frederick (Weinberg)
7:: Minus the Bear (9:30)
8:: Beach House (2640)

JULY
20:: Warped Tour (Merriweather Post Pavilion)
23:: Cap'n Jazz and Gauge (Black Cat)
23:: Monster Jam! (Hagerstown)

AUGUST
10:: mewihoutYou (Ottobar)
11:: Something Corporate (9:30)
23:: The Graduate (Ottobar)

SEPTEMBER
14:: The Graduate (Highline Ballroom)
18:: Broken Social Scene (Central Park)
23:: Pavement (Central Park)

OCTOBER
23:: Ted Leo (Public Assemby)
23:: Ted Leo (Record Fair)

NOVEMBER
1:: The Moth Story Slam (Some Bar in Brooklyn)

DECEMBER
4:: Minus the Bear (Terminal 5)
6:: Ted Leo (Terminal 5)

Day 30: A Song I Would Recommend to Anyone

2010-11-30T10:00:00.000-05:00

Day 30: A Song I Would Recommend to Anyone

Let's have a serious conversation about how fantastic and brilliant the Beach Boys were.

The Beach Boys:: "Good Vibrations"

As a side note, I could go for a piece of Dough Roller pizza and a swim in the pool about now. You?

Day 29: A Song with My Favorite Drumming

2010-11-29T10:00:00.001-05:00

Day 29: A Song with My Favorite Drumming

I like songs with heavy drums. I like loud, thumping, bass drums. I like when I see a band live and the drummer has multiple sets and dozens of bass drums.

Battles:: "Atlas"

But sometimes I just love drums.

Day 28: A Song With My Favorite Guitar Playing

2010-11-28T10:00:00.000-05:00

Day 28: A Song With My Favorite Guitar Playing

Dudes.

The Clash:: "London Calling"

Fun Clash Facts!
Joe Strummer wrote the words to "London Calling". Most of the album's music was arranged by Mick Jones.
Joe Strummer was actually a very poor guitarist.
I prefer Combat Rock to London Calling

Day 27: A Song With Your Favorite Singing

2010-11-27T10:00:00.000-05:00

Day 27: A Song With Your Favorite Singing

To say that I agonized over a choice would be nothing short of modest. I love many singers (many of them not "great"), ans many of them sound appropriately tortured by their own broken hearts.

Neko Case:: "This Tornado Loves You"

The other problem is that I love Neko Case the musician and Neko Case the lyricist. Neko Case the singer wins this round.

Day 26: A Song I First Heard In A Film or TV Show

2010-11-26T10:00:00.000-05:00

Day 26: A Song I First Heard In A Film or TV Show

Page France is a band from Maryland but I didn't know about it until I watched Weeds. Not embarrassing at all! Here's the band playing at a Maryland show:

Page France:: "Chariot"

I haven't listened to this song in more than two years. I was obsessed for a few weeks and listening again brings it all back.

Day 25: Songs That Have The Best Music Videos

2010-11-25T10:00:00.001-05:00

Day 25: Songs That Have The Best Music Videos

I am not clever. Your favorite videos are my favorite videos and those videos are someone else's favorite videos too. (John Jacob Jingleheimer Smith Na Na Nananana!)

A-Ha:: "Take On Me

Foo Fighters:: "Everlong"

Weezer:: "Buddy Holly"

Outkast:: "Ms. Jackson"

Andre 300 is shirtless. That's really all I can see right now. Oh, this too:

Outkast:: "B.O.B."

Modest Mouse:: "Dashboard"

Day 24: A Song I Didn’t Like But Now Love

2010-11-24T10:00:00.000-05:00

Day 24: A Song I Didn’t Like But Now Love

I didn't love Carole King when I was a youth. I was stupid. Carole King is one of the greatest, and one of my favorite, songwriters. Tapestry is one of my favorite albums, and I wasted a few years Not Getting It. Of course now I wish she'd stop touring with James Taylor so I could buy a concert ticket.

Carole King:: "Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow"

Bonus video of King on Gilmore Girls!

Day 23: A Song No One Would Expect Me to Love

2010-11-23T10:00:00.009-05:00

Day 23: A Song No One Would Expect Me to Love

I'm not sure if Ice Cube's "It Was A Good Day" is more accurate, but I'm getting through life pretending that my friends and acquaintances have acknowledged and accepted my deep abiding love of hip-hop, and would be shocked to know that I love nu metal group Deftones. By and large, everyone is blase about these kind of things.

Deftones:: "Be Quiet And Drive (Far Away)"

Deftones was a big, no huge, part of my life as a teen.

Oh, what the heck. Here is Ice Cube. I have a soft spot for that man. (Seriously. If he's in a movie, there's no doubt that I'll watch it.)

Ice Cube:: "It Was A Good Day"

Overcompensating, by Jeffrey Rowland. Published February 15, 2009.

Day 22: A Short Song I Love (-2 min)

2010-11-22T10:00:00.002-05:00

Day 22: A Short Song I Love (-2 min)

Today is a good day for a spring in our step!

Leslie Gore:: "Sunshine, Rainbows, and Lollipops"

Currently in my mom's backseat, you guys

2010-11-21T19:40:00.000-05:00

My 23rd birthday fell on a Saturday two years ago, and because my mom had the day off, and I lived at home, my mom and I spent the entire day together. It was the best birthday day ever (the night was all about stupid heartbroken tears and I vowed to never celebrate my birthday ever again, which has held up, mostly*). We went to lunch downtown, and then we went to Borders, where I was allowed to pick out any book I wanted for my birthday.

Do you have any idea of much fun that is? Think of all of those books you are too embarrassed to check out at the library (mostly books about boogers--when it's about something salacious, I have no shame) or those books too heavy or expensive to buy yourself. (Like the Annie Lebovitz book I got for Christmas that year.)

I picked out The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman (it was brand new) and A Long Way Down by Nick Horsnby (it was on the sale table). Last year I picked out Local. It's on my nightstand in Brooklyn.

This year was difficult. I couldn't find any comic books I wanted. I've DVR'd The Walking Dead but failed to watch it (I had a dream about the zombie apocalypse after I saw the preview during Mad Men--I was in the South, and it was more like Breathers than Walking Dead, but I didn't like it), and I've read all of the Chew that's available. The other books I picked up I've rejected before. I couldn't remember the name of the roller derby biography I wanted, and the FDR/Eleanor book that's out I plan to get at the library. I looked everywhere but couldn't find the Jay-Z book anywhere.

I wasted 40 minutes before I realized I still haven't read Anne of Green Gables. I keep Pride and Prejudice next to my bed as a reminder of who I am, where I'm going, and what I believe, I have no reservations with making references to Little House on the Prairie and The Five Lttle Peppers at a moment's notice, but I know nothing of Sweet Anne from Canada, so I found an unabriged copy in the teen section and my mom took it to the register.

The woman in front of my mom bought a book and the clerk said, "This is flying off the shelves!" My mom is a woman who needs the latest literary news, and made an inquiry as to the woman's purchase. When the clerk said it was Jay-Z's new book I fought the urge to throw my body on to the floor with frustration. (Which I more or less had already done in the comic book aisle.) The clerk offered to find us a copy, and he did, the very last one in the back room.

So I got two books. (And I know this is tacky, but I got both with discounts and Borders Bucks, so yay!) I took Anne in my purse and left Jay-Z behind, because I'll be home in a few days, and he's hardcover.

Yay, books.

*I made an exception for K, who let me celebrate on the accident anniversary instead, which I'd much rather make a toast to. Look, I can walk! I lift heavy things, I can do anything I want now! Drinking cocktails at Cienfuegos and eating a liege waffle on the 18th is preferable, and K is my only friend in my speed dial, plus he's a true, loyal, friend. He's also hard to argue with, so if he wants to drink in honor of something, we might as well.

Day 21: A Long Song You Love (7 minutes+)

2010-11-21T10:00:00.002-05:00

I have a 12:12 version of "Wham City" on my computer. The album version of Dan Deacon's song is (supposedly) 10 minutes in length. Any length (there's a less than seven minute version, too) makes me deliriously happy. It reminds me of the long, hot summer I spent in Baltimore.

I worked three jobs that summer, took two summer classes, and recall sweating often. "Wham City" reminds me the way the wooden floors creaked at my old job, the way ice cream melted and stuck to the insides of my elbows, and the sweet relief of riding downhill at the end of the day, in the dark hot night, to my apartment.

Dan Deacon:: "Wham City"

This video is from a show in California. I was too busy watching my friends dance this year to take a video on my own.

Runner Up: Modest Mouse and 764-Hero:: "Whenever You See Fit"

Day 20: A Song I Have Learned Something From

2010-11-20T10:00:00.000-05:00

Day 20: A Song I Have Learned Something From

With the help of my older sister, I learned the birth and death of a star by memorizing the words to a They Might Be Giants song. I was in the fifth grade.

They Might Be Giants:: "Why Does the Sun Shine?

The version I "learned" was from Out of This World. (The "listen" link isn't what it sounded like either...)

Day 19: My Favorite B-Side

2010-11-19T10:00:00.003-05:00

Day 19: My Favorite B-Side

My favorite Pearl Jam song is a b-side for their first big hit. "Yellow Ledbetter" is the other side of "Jeremy", a song that's REALLY GOOD but I don't want to hear ever again. Sorry, everyone!

Pearl Jam:: "Yellow Ledbetter"

"Yellow Ledbetter" was recorded for Ten but never included on the album. It ended peaking at No. 21 on the Billboard chart.

Day 18: My Favorite Cover Song

2010-11-18T10:00:00.001-05:00

Day 18: My Favorite Cover Song

"These Days" was written, and performed, by Jackson Browne in the 1960s. Nico recorded and released the song in 1967. I love Nico's version. (I'm also pretty fond of St. Vincent's 2006 release.)

This is the song, as used in The Royal Tenenbaums.

Day 17: A Song Recorded Live

2010-11-17T10:00:00.007-05:00

Day 17: A Song Recorded Live

I've had Kate Nash:: "We Get On" BBC Radio, February 2007 in my head since May. Some weeks in August I'd wake up with the song playing a loop. (Lyrics)

Day 16: A Song That Makes Me Think Of A Specific Animal

2010-11-16T10:00:00.000-05:00

Day 16: A Song That Makes Me Think Of A Specific Animal

I don't like alligators or crocodiles. They leap out of the water and eat you. Seems like a good enough reason to stay out of Florida.

Ugly Casanova:: "Things I Don't Remember"

Things I don't remember/Dressed up alligators/How'd the hell we get here/Things I don't remember/There was dressed up alligator...

This video is a little repulsive. Sorry about that.

25 for 25

2010-11-15T10:15:00.002-05:00

My mom celebrated a "landmark" year this year, so I made her a series of CDs celebrating her awesome life with one song for each year she's impacted the world with her presence. To make sure that was possible, I tried the same method for 1985–present. This is my list.

1985 Run DMC:: "King of Rock" (from 1985's King of Rock)

1986 The Beastie Boys:: "Girls" (from 1986's License to Ill)

1987 Guns N' Roses:: "Welcome to the Jungle" (from 1987's Appetite for Destruction)

1988 Bobby McFerrin:: "Don't Worry, Be Happy" (from 1988's Simple Pleasures)

1989 The Cure:: "Pictures of You" (from 1989's Disintegration)

1990 They Might Be Giants:: "Birdhouse In Your Soul" (from 1990's Flood)

1991 Big Audio Dynamite:: "The Globe" (from 1991's The Globe)

1992 Pearl Jam:: "Yellow Ledbetter" (from 1992's "Jeremy")

1993 Nirvana:: "Heart Shaped Box" (from 1993's In Utero)

1994 Weezer:: "Undone (The Sweater Song)" (from 1994's Weezer)

1995 The Smoking Popes:: "Need You Around" (from 1995's Born to Quit)

1996 Beck:: "Jack-Ass" (from 1996's Odelay)

1997 Deftones:: "Dai the Flu" (from 1997's Around the Fur)

1998 Modest Mouse and 764-HERO:: "Whenever You See Fit"

1999 The Get Up Kids:: "I'm A Loner Dottie, A Rebel..." (from 1999's Something to Write Home About)

2000 Jets to Brazil:: "Empty Picture Frame" (from 2000'a Four Cornered Night)

2001 Death Cab for Cutie:: "Coney Island" (from 2001's The Photo Album)

2002 Minus the Bear:: "Absinthe Party at the Fly Honey Warehouse" (from 2002's Highly Refined Pirates)

2003 Fairweather:: "The Culling Song" (from 2003's Lusitania)

2004 Jimmy Eat World:: "23" (from 2004's Futures)

2005 Bloc Party:: "This Modern Love" (from 2005's Silent Alarm)

2006 Grizzly Bear:: "On A Neck, On A Spit" (from 2006's Yellow House)

2007 The Graduate:: "Surround Yourself" (from 2007's Anhedonia)

2008 Russian Circles:: "Philios" (froom 2008 split with These Arms Are Snakes)

2009 Jeremy Engik:: "Mind Idea" (from 2009's OK Bear)

2010 Murder By Death:: "Foxglove" (from 2010's Good Morning, Magpie)

Songs that were shockingly pushed aside:

Beck:: "Beautiful Way" (1999)

Ted Leo and the Pharmacists:: "Little Dawn" (2004)

The Yeah Yeah Yeahs:: "Maps" (2004)

The Decemberists:: "Clementine" (2006)

Lykke Li:: "Little Bit" (2008)

Practically everything else by the Cure

That's OK, because there are my 25+ favorite songs:

Alkaline Trio:: “Crawl” (From Here to Infirmary, 2001)
The Beach Boys:: “In My Room” (Surfer Girl, 1963) / “Wouldn’t It Be Nice” (Pet Sounds, 1966)
Biz Markie:: “Just a Friend” (The Biz Never Sleeps, 1989)
Black Flag:: “Life of Pain” (Damaged, 1981)
Bloc Party:: “This Modern Love” (Silent Alarm, 2005)
Broken Social Scene:: “Lover’s Spit” (Bee Hives, 2004)
The Cardigans:: “Lovefool” (First Band On the Moon, 1996)
Daniel Johnston:: "True Love Will Find You In the End" (1990, 1990)
The Dead Milkmen:: “Punk Rock Girl” (Beelzebubba, 1988)
The Decemberists:: “Here I Dreamt I Was an Architect” (Castaways and Cutouts, 2002)
Everclear:: “Sunflowers” (So Much for the Afterglow, 1997)
Fairweather:: “Lusitania” (Lusitania, 2003)
Grizzly Bear:: “On a Neck, On a Spit” (Yellow House, 2006)
Jets to Brazil:: “Sweet Avenue” (Orange Rhyming Dictionary, 1998)
Joy Division:: “Love Will Tear Us Apart” (1980)
Minus the Bear:: “Absinthe at the Fly Honey Warehouse” (Highly Refined Pirates, 2002) / Minus the Bear:: “Hooray” (Menos el Oso, 2005)
Modest Mouse:: “You’re the Good Things” (...Yeah that’s you, yeah that’s you, yeah. Night on the Sun, 1999) / with 764-Hero:: “Whenever You See Fit” (1998)
Nico:: “These Days” (Chelsea Girl, 1967)
Nirvana:: “Heart Shaped Box” (In Utero, 1993)
Pearl Jam:: “Yellow Ledbetter” (“Jeremy”, 1992)
Radiohead:: “High and Dry” (The Bends, 1995)
Simon and Garfunkel:: “Bookends” (Bookends, 1968) / Simon and Garfunkel:: “Cecilia” (Bridge Over Troubled Water, 1970)
The Smoking Popes:: “Need You Around” (Born to Quit, 1994)
St. Vincent:: “Marry Me” (Marry Me, 2007)
Ted Leo and the Pharmacists:: “Me and Mia” (Shake the Sheets, 2004) / “Little Dawn” (Shake the Sheets, 2004)

Hooray for me! I am otherwise treating the day like any other, which seems perfect to me.

Day 15: A Song That Makes Me Think of a Specific Color

2010-11-15T10:00:00.002-05:00

Day 15: A Song That Makes You Think of a Specific Color

Green Day, duh. I think I'm supposed to dislike Green Day now that I am older and wiser, but it's my birthday, I'm 25, and nothing has changed. (I'm not sorry.)

I used to sing this every morning in the car on my long commute to work. It helped me show up to a job I hated with every cell in my body. (Sorry awesome former co-workers. I still love you.)

Green Day:: "Basketcase"

Bees!

2010-11-14T20:06:00.000-05:00

As seen at AMNH. More to come, eventually.

Day 14: A Song That Reminds Me of Someone Special

2010-11-14T10:00:00.008-05:00

Day 14: A Song That Reminds Me of Someone Special

I don't have Someone Special right now. I have awesome friends and an unparalleled snobbishness. I also have an idealized vision of a long-term monogamous relationship, and wandering Europe on foot, drinking wine, and looking at art encapsulates what I'm "looking for."

Minus the Bear:: "Absinthe Party at the Fly Honey Warehouse"

This is also my favorite Minus the Bear song.

Day 13: A Song That Makes Me Feel Nostalgic

2010-11-13T10:00:00.000-05:00

Day 13: A Song That Makes Me Feel Nostalgic

I tried to explain this summer that I can't remember a time when I didn't love the Cure, which was a hit or miss argument. I was born in the '80s, so I was a child at the height of the Cure's popularity.

I can't embed the video, so here's a link to the Tim Pope-directed video for "Friday I'm In Love".

It's a shame that today is Saturday...

Day 12: A Song I Can Play On An Instrument

2010-11-12T10:00:00.001-05:00

Day 12: A Song I Can Play On An Instrument

I learned to play the piano in middle school. I hoped that it would lead to guitar lessons. (It didn't.) At my very core, I'm a painfully shy person. It's only real manifestation now, other than the occasional awkwardness at a party, is my inability and absolute refusal to play piano for you.

No, really. I'm never going to sing or play piano for you. Ever. Even though I own plenty of sheet music and plan to inherit my mother's piano.

One collection of sheet music is an Andrew McMahon autographed book for Everything in Transit. I'm sure if I sat down I could play "The Mixed Tape" but please don't ever ask me to prove it. And God help you if you smudge that autograph.

Jack's Mannequin:: "The Mixed Tape"

Day 11: A Song Sung In A Foreign Language

2010-11-11T10:00:00.006-05:00

Day 11: A Song Sung In A Foreign Language

I fell in love with this song in middle school. It was my first incident wherein I fantasized of sophistication.

Stan Getz and Astrud Gilberto:: "The Girl from Ipanema"

Anyone up for Brazil? I'll get my little black dress, a phrase book, and our passports. I hope you don't mind, but I'm going to do my hair like Betty Draper in Italy.

Day 10: Guilty Pleasure Songs

2010-11-10T10:00:00.000-05:00

Day 10: Guilty Pleasure Songs

I don't believe in guilty pleasures. I know my taste in various media is often questionable, but when I love it, I love it without shame. I find I have to defend loving high art as much as I defend "low brow" media, so I lack guilt in both areas. (I'll often fake it if I think it makes the lambasting shorter.)

Instead, I present songs I love with an acknowledgment that you will surely provide a harsh critique.

Friendly Fires:: "Paris"

Passion Pit:: "The Reeling

Pharrell Williams:: "Prettiest Girls"

Day 09: A Song I Fall Asleep To

2010-11-09T10:00:00.002-05:00

Day 09: A Song I Fall Asleep To

Broken Social Scene:: "Lover's Spit"

This is obviously a fan video, but it's an epicly long song, from Bee Hives, so there's not an official video. (There's a limit to what I can MegaUpload.) Anyway, this is the version of the song I prefer.

Day 08: A Song I Like to Wake Up To

2010-11-08T10:00:00.000-05:00

Day 08: A Song I Like to Wake Up To

I'm a big fan of The Current and try to listen to MPR in the morning when I wake up and get ready. Sometimes, however, I'll fire up my morning playlist. This is my reliable standard:

Blur:: "Coffee and TV"

Up and at 'em, Tiger!

Day 07: An Acoustically Performed Song

2010-11-07T10:00:00.001-05:00

Day 07: An Acoustically Performed Song

I managed to avoid the weird college dude with an acoustic guitar. I present a Take Away Show with Grizzly Bear instead.

Grizzly Bear:: "On a Neck, On a Spit"

You knew this song and video would show up at some point.

Day 06: A Song That Makes Me Laugh

2010-11-06T10:00:00.001-04:00

Day 06: A Song That Makes You Laugh

I know everything about this song, and the original (Eazy-E "Boyz-n-the-Hood") is offensive, inflammatory, and unamusing. And I want to acknowledge some guilt regarding this cover, because it's never OK for white people to use the N word. Moreover, the point of the song is "ha ha ha" white people are singing a scary black song! Quite frankly, that attitude makes me nauseous (see also: Girl Talk, white teens' love for Kanye West), and I promise that's not why I laugh.

Dynamite Hack:: "Boyz-n-the-Hood"

Day 05: A Song That Makes Me Cry

2010-11-05T10:00:00.008-04:00

Day 05: A Song That Makes Me Cry

This was a tough one. Most of the songs I immediately thought of don't make me cry now. And the songs most people would think of ("The Luckiest" or "Mad World") are songs I like.

Ben Folds:: "Still Fighting It"

I received "Still Fighting It" on a mix CD from a good friend when I was a teenager. The CD was mostly Ben Folds/Five and a few Get Up Kids songs. (I remember that summer as hot, stressful, and full of angst.)

Weirdly, it's not the summer, or the CD that makes me occasionally teary. I'm not even sure what it is, either. But it's often involuntary, and I was surprised that I didn't cry when Ben Folds performed early this year.

Day 04: A Song That Makes Me Happy

2010-11-04T10:00:00.003-04:00

Day 04: A Song That Makes You Happy

I dare you not to be happy. TRY ME.

Bill Withers:: "Lovely Day"

Your day is lovelier already.

Day 03: My Favorite Instrumental Song

2010-11-03T10:00:00.000-04:00

American Football:: "The One with the Wurlitzer"

Complicated emotional attachment aside, WURLITZER.

Day 02: A Song With My Favorite Lyrics

2010-11-02T10:00:00.003-04:00

Day 02: A Song With My Favorite Lyrics

This is so unfair. One song? May I choose two from one artist? OK then.

Ted Leo and the Pharmacists:: "Me and Mia"

Do you believe in something beautiful?/Then get up and be it

Ted Leo and the Pharmacists:: "Little Dawn"

But on the days and nights you try to breathe/And you can't believe you still walk the streets/Stretch out your weary hand to me - it's alright/And if you're not content to just believe/And if you don't consent to just let it be/Stretch out your legs and dance with me all night, tonight/It's alright

Day 01: My Favorite Song

2010-11-01T10:00:00.040-04:00

Happy NaBloPoMo (that's National Blog Posting Month)! I know some of you are in the November doldrums, and some of you need more material in your RSS feeds while you fritter away at work (though I've been more-than-helping you in that department).

I'm participating more seriously at Lessons for Old People, where I am encouraging my mom and sister to get it together and blog already. I'm providing thirty days of filler here by fulfilling that Tumblr meme. (You can see the full list at the bottom of this post.)

Let's begin!

Day 01: My Favorite Song

This is a tough question because I feel so desperately connected to so many songs. At heart, I am always a thirteen-year-old girl. I've judiciously narrowed it down ~~three~~ four. The first two are songs I am unlikely to tire of. Should I ever marry, these will play during the ceremony. And if Future Dude isn't OK with that, I don't think we should continue to see each other.

Smoking Popes:: "Need You Around"

Daniel Johnston:: "True Love Will Find You In the End" (from The Devil and Daniel Johnston)

The other two are Biz Markie's "Just a Friend" and Joy Division's "Love Will Tear Us Apart".

I'm always surprised when I make out these lists that I've neglected The Clash, Minus the Bear, and Ted Leo. I'll publish a longer list on my birthday in two weeks.

Day 01: Your favorite song.
Day 02: A song with your favorite lyrics.
Day 03: Your favorite instrumental song.
Day 04: A song that makes you happy.
Day 05: A song that makes you cry.
Day 06: A song that makes you laugh.
Day 07: An acoustically performed song.
Day 08: A song you like to wake up to.
Day 09: A song you like to fall asleep to.
Day 10: A guilty pleasure song.
Day 11: A song sung in a foreign language.
Day 12: A song you can play on an instrument.
Day 13: A song that makes you feel nostalgic.
Day 14: A song that reminds you of someone special.
Day 15: A song that makes you think of a specific colour.
Day 16: A song that makes you think of a specific animal.
Day 17: A song recorded live.
Day 18: Your favorite cover song.
Day 19: Your favorite b-side.
Day 20: A song you have learned something from.
Day 21: A long song you love (7min +).
Day 22: A short song you love (2min -).
Day 23: A song no one would expect you to love.
Day 24: A song you didn’t like but now love.
Day 25: A song that has the best music video.
Day 26: A song you first heard in a film/TV show.
Day 27: A song with your favorite singing.
Day 28: A song with your favorite guitar playing.
Day 29: A song with your favorite drumming.
Day 30: A song you would recommend to anyone.

Items 28, 68, 70: COMPLETED

2010-10-09T19:20:00.005-04:00

If, God Forbid, the Birdhouse catches on fire, I'm grabbing my baby blanket (pictured above) and stuffed bear first. (Yes, I brought both to New York.*) Then I'm diving for my hard drives and my laptop and Everything I Own. But the blanket comes first.

Grandma Genny, my maternal grandmother, made my baby blanket. It's slightly smaller than the average welcome mat (I was a tiny baby), pink with a white edge, and has embroidered animals on it. More accurately, it had embroidered animals on it. I dragged my blanket everywhere: to the car on adventures with my dad, to North Dakota and Indiana to visit family, to college, and all over the house growing up. I would routinely lose it in the house and suffer a breakdown just before bed.

My quilt was the fourth in a series. My sisters were given a yellow and blue versions, while my cousin received an orange duplicate. My younger cousin was given a blue quilt when he was born.

When my sister announced her pregnancy, I knew what I had to do. I needed to finally learn quilting (No. 68), embroidery (No. 28), and appropriate sewing machine maintenance (No. 80). At the risk of sounding like this was easy...I did.

I scoured the Internet for articles, videos, blogs, and tips regarding sewing, quilting, and embroidery. I e-mailed my friend Becki, a superb crafter and Pints and Purls's fearless leader (she let me join when I moved, even though I can't knit or crochet), for ideas and resources. Becki came through like a true champion, and helped me get a jump start on understanding the world of crafting. (Thank you so much!)

And then I signed up for classes. I signed up for two introductory classes with JoAnn Fabrics, and arranged to meet an embroidery expert at Needles and Pins in Frederick, MD.

I'd like to briefly diverge. This was the stage of the project where strangers told me I'd never finish the quilt. These classes and meetings were in June, and though I knew my sister was visiting in September, I only mentioned that the baby is due in December. No one thought I would finish twelve panels and one quilt before Christmas. These people were also convinced that by attempting this task, I would open the Hell Mouth. SPOILER: my wooden stakes remain safe under my pillow, unused, and I finished the quilt. No blood was shed and nobody died.

It's worth noting, of course, that my friends, family, and adult supporters (my mom's friends) were sure I could finish this on time. And I did! In fact, I finished it early. (Somebody had to move to New York.)

I learned embroidery in a few hours. I learned the lazy daisy stitch, back stitch, French knot, and the satin stitch. I also learned that red thread bleeds, and that if I prick my finger (which I will), and the blood gets on the fabric, it will never come out. (I asked if the woman had tried hair spray but she ignored me. I know how to get blood out of fabric, as I am hapless.)

The class was a bigger struggle, as I am left-handed. 90 percent of the population is right-handed, and my left-handedness really ruined things for everyone else. (I think I was asked if couldn't I use my right hand this one time, like everyone else? Uh, no, I can't.) The basic tenants of the class were to cut fabric and sew it together. The machine in the class was far more advanced than the machine I've inherited, or the machine I learned to sew on. Moreover, the class didn't teach me how to use it. It would seem that when push came to shove, I was able to remember what my mother taught me in the past (and more than once). I guess I didn't need to add that to my Life List.

The class itself was sort of a bust, really. I was kicked out of the second class--even though it was a follow-up to the first class, it was "too advanced" for someone who has "never quilted before." I was sneeringly asked to let everyone know how my project "goes." (I've been back to the store but never said, I finished, na na na na na.) My money was refunded and I went home and figured out what I could alone, which was everything until the quilt was in its final stages and I panicked.

My least favorite step was cutting fabric. When I do this again I will charm my way into having the fabric pre-cut. I'm serious. I know that a real quilter cuts her own fabric, but the stress is too much to handle. My mom insisted that Grandma cut by hand, but I'd already been indoctrinated by JoAnn's, who promised that cutting by hand would ruin my niece. If I cut fabric with scissors, the baby is going to be a republican! She's going to run on an anti-masturbation, anti-gay, anti-feminist platform! NOOOOOOO!

I've now survived getting hit by a car, losing my best friends, unemployment, and cutting fabric properly.

I had a small army of volunteers helping me with my squares. My grandfather agreed to do a square--it seemed appropriate, because he assisted Grandma with her quilts, and picked the embroidery colors, even though he's color blind--and then requested that I send him a total of three. Don't tell Grandpa, but I'm hoarding the other two squares, in case there are other grandchildren. (Or if I don't have children, I plan to frame my square in my home office.)

Because Grandpa got a square, my Aunt, my sister, and my mother got squares too. I assigned my aunt the bear (blue, because my sister's favorite stuffed bear was blue), my sister the donkey (also blue, because we're freedom-loving patriots), and my mom the cow. Mom asked for the cow, and it's purple. The square assigned to the quit from Grandpa was a yellow squirrel. (His favorite color is yellow, and I do not like squirrels. Justifiably so.) In the final week, when I was increasingly away from home, Mom stepped in. She finished a green deer, and did a beautiful job finishing the back stitching on another animal. Mom remembered embroidery as a task she hated--when she needed to contribute to a family quilt, she outsourced her work to her sister. Mom remembered squandering hours on a poorly executed job, but her stitches were neater than mine. And I don't want to brag, but once I got the hang of it, I did fantastic work.

And I loved it. I love embroidery. (I've purchased several kits from Sublime Stitching, and I can't wait to start on something new.)

Here are the squares:

When I wasn't focused on handiwork, I was looking for the perfect yellow fabric. I visited every store in the tri-state area before I settled on The Perfect Yellow at my local JoAnn's. (I know. I'm disappointed too.) I knew I wanted the color butter becomes when you've forgotten to put it away after dinner and find it in the morning when you're pouring coffee. A soft, serene yellow. I settled on yellow before I knew my sister was having a girl, and though a calm mint would also be gender neutral, I accept yellow with more ease.

Cutting was a hassle, again. There was blood shed (but not on the fabric!) and a lot of coaching from my mother's friends. We had an old friend of my mother's over to walk us through the steps. She was wildly supportive, and later asked us if we'd let her finish the quilt.

I won't lie to you, Internet. We let her. Mom and I sewed the top together, and we took it to "Grandma Ann's" for moral support. When Mom's friend called the next day, asking if she could be a part of the process, and asking if she could do the binding, we agreed. The pressure was mounting, and I was scared I'd have to start from scratch in my New York apartment.

The quilt is perfect, and I know that it is because I had help from others.

There is a second quilt, too. I thought I'd test my skills on a smaller project before I pieced the large quilt together. I bought this moon fabric (Heather Ross's Far Far Away II) and used the same yellow fabric from the backing. Ultimately, this quilt was made after the large quilt. It's soft and has ribbons to attach to the stroller and car seat. (Yay!)

I left my sewing machine in Maryland, which is just as well, because I'm too tired and "too busy" to start on the t-shirt quilt right now. I have joined my friend's crafting group, and hope to work on embroidery at the next meetup. (The group is for sewing and crocheting, but I've been given permission to embroider.)

When I told Fake Grandma about the quilt several months ago, she excitedly told me I could make my sister a baby clothes quilt when the baby is older. Even though I've confessed to tiredness, I can't wait to start on that quilt. I'll know my niece better, and hopefully I'll have improved cutting confidence.

*My good friend and I wandered through Ikea for several hours the afternoon following a rather stupendous night of drinking. (I wasn't hungover, but I needed a large Mountain Dew to cope.) She told me that when she was little, she was worried she wouldn't be allowed to bring her items to college. Her mother advised her to keep them in a box under her bed. To paraphrase my friend she told me, "I figured, screwed that, this is mine, and I'm taking it with me. I DON'T CARE." I'd rather my housemates didn't know, but I otherwise DO NOT CARE. I sleep awesomely.

Item No. 73: Completed

2010-10-03T10:54:00.000-04:00

73.Ride a bike in a new city.

View Larger Map

When I wrote No. 73 as part of my Life List, I had really meant ride a bike through tulip fields in Denmark and ride my bike next to Lake Michigan's North Shore Beach. It wasn't until I was pedaling through the streets of Brooklyn that I realized I was accomplishing another goal.

North Shore Beach, Chicago

I met someone in Bushwick for a scenic ride through Brooklyn. I borrowed a bike, and a helmet, and we rode from Bushwick, Brooklyn, to Brooklyn Bridge Park. I sailed through Fort Greene, Clinton Hill, Downtown Brooklyn, Brooklyn Heights, and DUMBO. In all, I biked 7–10 miles before I left Bushwick for the train to take me home to Crown Heights.

It was a beautiful day, and regrettably I left my camera at home. I needed to charge the battery, so it was a sacrifice I needed to make. It was, however, not one I enjoyed. The weather was just perfect, and Brooklyn Bridge Park is as lovely as the Brooklyn Bridge. I was shocked that the waterfront smelled like water, and not trash or algae.

The park is also the home of the Brooklyn Ice Cream Factory, where I was treated to a large, messy cup of chocolate ice cream.

I'm pretty sore today, so if you find me, I'll be able to provide evidence via my slow movement. (And yet I plan to go to the Flea and the Highline anyway.)

You're Dead to Me, Katie Price

2010-09-28T21:25:00.000-04:00

BOOOO.

Item No. 89: Completed

2010-09-26T23:13:00.001-04:00

To access the art supply store, 711, or the mall, from my college campus required an uphill walk ("dance party") passed the off-campus book store, a shady pizza place, the library, and a psychic's office (pictured above, from Google Maps). Passing the psychic always reminded me that I was curious about my predictions. I've wanted to know what a seer would say if I plunked down some money for a reading, but I've never gathered the nerve to find out.

I went to Maker Faire today, and I passed a woman under the craft tent who was offering $5 readings. I gathered my courage, and my five dollars, and sat down for a "face reading." (With a sliding scale I could have had a palm reading or a tarot reading.)

The woman asked me my name and my birthdate and told me the following:

-I'm a good, nice person, with a "kind heart."
-I have a temper. "Not because [I] want to hurt anyone, but because [I] need to blow off steam."
-When I tell someone something, I mean it, and I'm always true to my word.
-There's a big decision coming up, and the choice I make will be the right one.
-This decision will lead to great success! It will be rewarding for me personally and financially.
-I am, however, financially successful now.
-Even though I am not good with money.
-This is "fine, because [I] don't care about money. [I] know money will not make [me] happy."

Then I was asked if I'm single. I had to think that over, though I don't know why—when was the last time I had a boyfriend?—and said that I am not in a relationship. (She seemed to think I was.) In regards to love and romance, the next person I'm "with" will love me for "all that [I] am." She said this with great conviction. Apparently the next dude I'm in a relationship with will love me completely, and quite deeply. I wasn't promised children or marriage, but I wasn't promised great heartache, either. I was also promised a more in-depth reading for additional funds, and I declined. (I said I like the surprise, but I'd also like to save some of my money, the money I manage poorly, too.)

Most of it is true. I have been known to have a temper. I'm a shoddy liar, and I'd like to think I generally stick to my words. (I don't mind going above and beyond for my friends or my job.) I also put my foot in my mouth pretty regularly. As much as I adore my freedom in singledom, I think it would be nice to be in a relationship with someone I like, who likes me. It sounds nice to have someone I'm always happy to see, someone I look forward to seeing on a regular basis, and I am not related to. (Or e-mailing at 3 a.m. with reports on another failed date.)

I'm happy I plunked down a fiver and had a "face reading." It was fun, even if my body language is 100% predictable. I'd do it again. Actually, I still plan to do a tarot and palm reading, just on a different day, when it's part of my budget.

You can see my full life list here.

Not From My Life List

2010-09-05T16:32:00.001-04:00

I'd been to New York dozens of times before I moved last weekend. I'd been with my best friends, my mom, and my sisters, but never my brother-in-law. (But I've been with my other brother-in-law!)

Because my sister and her husband helped me move, the awful tradition had finally changed. After we moved in we went out for coffee (in Williamsburg), drinks (Cienfuegos), and dinner (Japanese).

Cienfuegos was lethal. As is tradition when I drink with my brother-in-law, I ended up inebriated before dinner. It's a cute bar though, and I can't wait to drag K over one night. (Also typical of adventures with my siblings and their partners.) And I'll definitely have the ladies drink here, too.

Regarding No. 76

2010-09-04T00:29:00.000-04:00

I had to run after a train today. I have a strict policy against running after trains and buses, stemming from the undignified days of high school, but it's a long wait for a train at night, so I broke into a sprint to chase down the 3.

...I needed the two.

Still, I'm comforted knowing that if I need to escape some sort of situation, I'm able to do it! Probably short distances. I don't know.

Regrettably, I'm on ice pack duty, so this isn't completed yet.

(Though I'd have ice packs out. It's so freaking hot. UGH.)

2010-09-02T07:16:00.000-04:00

This has been bothering me all week. How will I copy edit the Tea Party if they don't show up with signs?

"the rules of roller derby… demonstrated with doughnuts"

2010-08-25T11:42:00.000-04:00

As posted on the WFTDA Tumblr:

This video includes two of my life goals, incorporating Voodoo Doughnuts and roller derby together as one!

More About How There Are No Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesdays*

2010-08-23T10:00:00.004-04:00

Hello, dear Internet!

Let's talk about some things since I'm moving to New York and haven't posted a COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAY in a few weeks. First, my portfolio, is going to be "taken down" so I can make it marginally prettier and provide actual articles instead of links to articles. (Because apparently The Towerlight thinks it can truncate its archives when it upgrades the server or something. I'm ignoring that I graduated two years ago.) Not that you were checking it, but the most professional things first!

As you (should) know, I'm moving to New York for my career. As such, currently publishing blogs will take a break while I get adjust. The food blog, Sweet Umbrellas, didn't have any September posts in the queue when I wrote this, so it may be dormant. (Or I might post randomly as I eat my way through the city.) It's not an official Winsome Icarus blog anyway.

Perils of Public Transportation has been languishing, so a hiatus is rather irrelevant right now. However, I'm trying to figure out what the next step there will be, and hope to write about transportation again and tell stories about New York transit. I'll re-do the design, too.

Lessons for Old People is on a break and will merrily return in October. It will participate in NaBloPoMo too, and the posts will be about blogging.

I haven't made Copy Editing the Internet a formal part of the Winsome Icarus Product Line, but it will take a break too. It will return when I figure out the logistics. It would be nice if I figure that out by October.

I'm hoping to put a collection together for Macaroon Shindig this year. It's so old! But I'm not sure when that will happen. I promise to let you know here, which was the whole point of this blog anyway. Not writing about the mundane details of my life or posting videos from YouTube.

This blog is supposed to be about my projects, and that's my plan. I'll write about my Life List, since I started here, and didn't provide a RSS feed for its actual home. As for my life in general, I'm back to playing around with Tumblr. It's not a part of the Winsome Icarus Product Line, but if you miss me and want to check in (and I don't expect you will!), you'll have a place to find me.

*For now. I really like doing them. I really like copy editing things!

Mom, I am SO SORRY

2010-08-22T20:38:00.000-04:00

The worst part about this video is the YouTube caption: "Expect a full video for the track next week ahead of its Oct 4th release in the UK and US."

NO. NO, THAT CAN NOT, SIMPLY WILL NOT, DO. I want to snuggle with Cee-Lo Green's "Fuck You" video a long three-day weekend. No, I will snuggle with this video for a five-day work week, packing be damned!

How fantastic is this video? The color scheme is beautiful and joyous, the typeface is clean, neat, and varies in style, and the video provides the lyrics. It's like someone jacked it from The Corny Collins Show.

Item No. 55: Completed

2010-08-21T00:48:00.000-04:00

I am moving next weekend. To New York!

Item No. 55 Live in a New State: COMPLETED

When I wrote my Life List, I really meant Move Out of Frederick or Move Out of My Parents' House. The goal seemed rather low, and though I doubted I would ever move out of my parents' house, I wanted to pay rent and live independently again. I also hoped I might one day pick up and move to Chicago, Copenhagen, Los Angeles, New York, or San Francisco. New York Wins!

Frederick, MD is a nice place, but it's not the place for me. My parents are here, and I have a friend here, but there is little keeping me here since I don't have a job or much going for me here. In New York, I can eat a chorizo taco whenever I want, which may define the pinnacle of heaven. I suppose eating a chorizo taco whenever I want and having regular access to Mad Men might be better, but it seems downright blasphemous to think that could happen to someone like me. (I'm somewhat unclear on the television details in The Birdhouse. OH GOD, I'M GOING TO MISS SEEING YOU EVERY WEEK, DON. AND YOU TOO, SKINNY TIE TV BOYFRIEND.)

I will unload a van (with the generous help of my sister and her husband) in Brooklyn, and two days later, start my new job in publishing. After nine months of unemployment, I will become a productive member of society!

I'll also pay rent, buy groceries, find a neighborhood bodega, and learn what it's like to be a New York resident. I've never lived outside of Maryland, so this is going to be a new experience.

Me, age one, playing in a mountain of newspapers on Moving Day in 1987. My family was moving to the house my parents live in now.

As long as I don't come home with my tail between my legs in October, everything's going to be great. I'm not sure everyone I know agrees, and that sucks, but I'm not even sure that I care. (But I'm hitting publish a week early, so how embarrassing would that be? How about I not update the site until I've unpacked!)

Item No. 67: Completed

2010-08-16T21:25:00.000-04:00

I went to New York to go apartment hunting, and dragged my sister along. She's good luck, because I found one. At the very least, these apartments were dramatically better than the ones I looked at earlier in the week when I hunted alone.

My sister has always said her favorite spot for brunch is Prune in New York City. We've traveled to the city a few times together, but never made it there because I'm generally incapable of waking up early on a Sunday. If you want to eat at Prune, you'd better line up outside before the restaurant opens at 10 a.m.

I vowed not to be the one who held us back Sunday morning, and we got in line at 9:50, putting us as one of the last group's to sit in the morning rush. Hooray! We sat downstairs with a friend, and I ordered fresh ricotta (ricotta with raspberries, toasted pine nuts, honey, figs, merveilles) and my sister ordered the Dutch style pancake. ("One large individual pancake, cooked in the oven, with blueberries. Served with sour cream and sugar.") We tried to order bloody Marys, but there's a law preventing alcohol before noon, so I had Prune juice, which isn't prunes, but a blend of citrus fruits.

I was pretty happy with brunch, and relieved that I had finally made it there.

Copy Edit Douchebag

2010-08-12T21:29:00.001-04:00

This one is a doozy. There's a woman, in Canada, who runs a hilarious Twitter account detailing her work as a phone sex operator. She was doing this anonymously, until this week, when a jealous dude threatened to out her. So she outed herself as Cristi Olson. She's vowed to keep Tweeting.

Jezebel revealed his identity as Adam White, a New York-based writer.

Olson refused to identify White on her Formspring account, as White would get the attention he so desperately desired. I feel a little guilty sharing his work with you, but his inability to string together a sentence needed my red pen so badly, that I simply couldn't contain myself. I may not get it together either, but I don't brag about my writing prowress, SO GAME ON.

MY GOD, THIS GUY IS UNBEARABLE

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAY

2010-08-03T10:00:00.009-04:00

Good news! This is the last COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAY. I'm going to start a new job and don't "need" to continue this fantastic series. I'll probably resume it as soon as I have the logistics figured out. (Somebody hasn't begun to pack yet, and therefore, doesn't know where the USB for her old scanner is.) The Tumblr will eventually resume as well.

Today's entries are one Frederick Missed Connection and two Rooms/Shares from New York.

About Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday: I troll the Missed Connections forums (generally Baltimore, DC, and Frederick, and generally m4w as they provide the most guffaws) for hilarious, strange, and modestly creepy grammatically incorrect posts. I print the most interesting, desperate, or strange posts, and copy edit the posts with my trusty red pen. I scan the entries and share them every Tuesday. I do this because I worry my skills will suffer under this winter of discontent and unemployment.

The tag for these thrilling entries is here. I assure you that you will want to read all of the entries.

This Week's Stupid Injury OR Why I'm Not Going to Thurmont Ever Again

2010-07-31T18:09:00.000-04:00

I drove to Thurmont Monday to put a bunch of pallets in my car (it seemed like a good idea at the time). None of them fit, and as I rearranged the trunk and tried not to scratch my paint, I dropped the pallet on my knee. It's so gross. In the end I found a pallet in Frederick.

The last time I went to Thurmont I came home with a flat tire. My sister said this is proof I need to stay out of Thurmont, and I agree.

Seriously, this blog. It's all gross pictures of my stupid injuries. I vow to provide better content when I move to New York. I'll provide the small-town-girl-moves-to-big-city cliche.

Or something.

MONSTER JAM: WORRRRRLD FIIIINAAAAALS!

2010-07-30T10:00:00.039-04:00

I took my best friends to MONSTER JAM: WORLD FINALS last weekend. I'll spoil the surprise: Grave Digger lost and the show was kind of a bust. It's a shame, because the show was hosted at Hagerstown Speedway, and my Honda Civic was one of only a handful of cars in a sea of trucks. (See above, multiple my several hundred.)

I dragged my friends to the show because my first experience was so thrilling. In February, I paid for the seat yet only needed the edge! There were thrills, chills, and near spills!

Saturday hosted several spills (there was a buggy event with two crashes!) but almost no thrills, and thankfully, no chills. (It was more than 100 degrees. The temperature could account for the outcome, but I think it's more complicated than that.)

We arrived twenty minutes late, but it hardly explains the evening. We saw half a race, a halftime show (lackluster compared to February's event), no t-shirt cannons (as a result, it did exclude scantily clad women), and almost no action.

The February event was over-the-top in its enthusiasm. Each driver received a huge trophy at the end of the race, then the driver would make a spectacle about giving the trophy to "the biggest fan" in the arena. It was always a kid, and there were usually toys and other giveaways too. A section of seats was devoted to "judges" who provided scores. It's not the giveaways so much as the insane enthusiasm, and I was ready for everything to be as extreme as possible.

This is Grave Digger's freestyle effort:

Poor Grave Digger. Poor us! Only a portion of the track is used, so there's hardly anything to see. We sat at one end, and there was considerably more action at the other end. (We were on the end with the deceased cars, and only two trucks utilized them.) Compare to February:

(Grave Digger was more interesting, but all I have are photos.) Look at all there was for the truck to do!

Our crowd was excited, but I left wanting more. Moreover, I felt like I had failed my friends. I had provided entertainment, but I hadn't provided the thrilling evening I had hoped for.

Oh, Hagerstown, why did you forsake me?

No. 15: Completed

2010-07-28T10:00:00.010-04:00

I wrote an essay (if you can call it that) when I was four. It was about ice cream, and my grandpa, and it won me a trip to California to tour the Edy's factory and taste test ice cream. My sister wrote an essay and won too, and since we were minors, Edy's paid for our Mom to go, so we all got on a plane with my other sister and met my grandparents in California. I was a well-behave plane passenger, ate spaghetti in a hotel, and promptly fell asleep. Over the next three days I went to Disneyland (I spent most of the rides with my head buried in someone's lap), toured the ice cream factory, and tried every Edy's flavor for sale and in development.

This experience means that I am supremely qualified (or regular qualified) to judge ice cream, eat ice cream, and pursue ice cream.

This is exactly what I did in New York last week. In town for something entirely different, I took a bus to the Other Greatest City, and walked a mile to The Big Gay Ice Cream Truck (BGICT) at the corner of Broadway and 17th, near Union Square upon my arrival.

The BGICT is a Mister Softee truck in New York. It opened in June 2009, and is operated by Douglas Quint, a professional bassoonist, and his partner Bryan Petroff. A big draw to the truck is the choinKwich, a chocolate cookie ice cream sandwich with Nutella and carmelized bacon, but the truck also offers a variety of specials and unique toppings. Wasabi pea dust, crushed Nilla wafers, and cardamom are only a few examples of what the truck offers.

Reviewers on Zagat call the truck "the best ice cream truck ever" and another writes, "I defy anyone to find any food service establishment with friendlier, more personalized service anywhere." The New York Times calls the truck "charming." The truck has also been lauded by Vanity Fair, The Onion A.V. Club, and NPR.

This press has made me a hungrier enthusiast, as I've been a BGICT follower for a long time. (Quint provides frequent updates via Twitter.) I've been trying to go to BGICT for a long time—I've been to New York at least twice and unable to go both times, so I was determined to make it this time:

I mad a frantic dash to the truck with plenty of time to spare, where I was faced with numerous options and no line:

Would you like cardamom, cayenne, peppermint syrup + cacao nibs, or olive oil and sea salt? Or maybe you'd like the Bea Arthur (dulce de leche, crushed Nilla wafers), the Salty Pimp (dulce de leche, sea salt, chocolate dip), the Cococone (toasted curry coconut), the Belgian Slipwich (a choinkwich without the bacon), or the Monday Sundae (Nutella lined waffle cone, dulce de leche, sea salt, whipped cream)?

I had a Salty Pimp. I ordered with excitement, and my order was received with excitement, and Doug lived up to all that had been said about him and more. I don't think I've ever met anyone in New York so friendly, and I've always felt like New York was one of the friendliest cities I've ever visited.

I asked Doug some questions about the choinkwich so I may make a sandwich in my own sandwich, and he gave me plenty of tips. When I make my sandwich, I'll write a post here for your consideration. (Or I may move before I have to, in which case, I'll let you know.)

Rhymest Is Wrong

2010-07-27T10:58:00.002-04:00

via Rachel Anna Dovey.

THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT, DUDE!

I don't even care about Waka Flocka. I should! I should be embarrassed, but I'm still addressing my other issues.

OOPS.

2010-07-27T10:00:00.000-04:00

...I forgot to do Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday. (I was really busy last week.)

I'll see you next week!

This blog is entirely pointless

2010-07-24T14:42:00.000-04:00

(Sorry about that.) I just had the best 15 minutes of my life. Or my Saturday. Probably my Saturday.

First, there was this video of Sam Rockwell dancing, as seen on Occasional Superheroine:

BUT THEN THERE WAS THIS VIDEO FROM JEZEBEL.

I wish I had thought of this for my film class in college instead of my Hills parody.

My general rule is to stop messing around with Jane Austen. Leave her alone! Let me have great literature without zombies, sea monsters, robots, vampires, or modern technology! Stop filming book clubs and let me re-read Darcy's speech at 3 a.m. without your new interpretations! But I have to let go here, because it makes me so ridiculously happy.

Comic Con Warms My Heart

2010-07-23T13:35:00.000-04:00

As previously discussed, one of the items on my Life List is to "ruin a protest." Mostly inspired by this guy, but also envious of these guys, I received a hearty approval from my friend's husband this week when I told him I want to crash a Tea Party gathering with a big red marker.

I know that when you protest a protest you "ruin" your effort, but it's my opinion that making a hatemonger look foolish is OK. (The problem is when the anti-protesters are arrested. That's when it's Totally Not Cool.) Anyway, those crazy kids at Comic Con challenged the Westboro Baptist Church this week and won! Make sure you click that link. Especially if you're an Old Person, so you have a positive association with an otherwise "odd" assortment of Young People.

More here: After Ellen, io9, Bleeding Cool, sandiego.com, Comics Alliance

Generic Life Update, Featuring Bandages and Dairy Products

2010-07-23T00:20:00.000-04:00

I went to my tenth Warped Tour this week. (Tenth!) Of the things that have happened (sun poisoning, ill-advised crowd surfing, knee skinning, those years Fall Out Boy broke its stage, that year Lars Frederiksen called me sweetie), this was the only time I skinned the back of my ankle slash developed a blister:

I wore newer supportive shoes (not pictured)...and then my standard Concert Shoes...never mind.

But at least I got ice cream for all of my trouble.

Tomorrow night, and probably Saturday, it's completely impractical footwear. Sorry, tired bones!

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAY (Week Twenty-Three)

2010-07-20T10:00:00.012-04:00

Welcome to Week Twenty-Three of Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday! If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

City Vista Safeway - You found an open line for us - m4m - 48 (DC)

To my mail stealing neighbor - w4m - 22 (418 Melrose St. Apt 1L in the back )

Dollar Store Scotts vly - m4w - 40 (scotts valley)

About Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday: I troll the Missed Connections forums (generally Baltimore, DC, and Frederick, and generally m4w as they provide the most guffaws) for hilarious, strange, and modestly creepy grammatically incorrect posts. I print the most interesting, desperate, or strange posts, and copy edit the posts with my trusty red pen. I scan the entries and share them every Tuesday. I do this because I worry my skills will suffer under this winter of discontent and unemployment.

The tag for these thrilling entries is here. I assure you that you will want to read all of the entries.

Today's XKCD

2010-07-16T00:42:00.000-04:00

Happy Friday, friends.

(I burned the crap out of my fingers, so that's all the commentary I can provide. Besides, it explains itself, no?)

Oh, Craigslist!

2010-07-14T22:52:00.000-04:00

I posted a missed connection on Craigslist several weeks ago. I read missed connections, and I edit missed connections, so I wanted to see how it works to post a missed connection. In the interest of fairness, I described myself, an event I was actually at, and a person I actually saw.

So far, the responders have been very confident, traditionally attractive men. That is, they remind me of a boy I "dated" in high school. (He was an athlete, had no neck, a tiny head, a huge attitude, and a soul crushing sense of entitlement. He was unbearable.) One e-mail boasted about the man's athleticism, and was so over-the-top in its own stereotype that I'm not entirely convinced that the e-mail is not from one of you. (In fact, I thought of this post from Que Sera Sera.) He was all, I myself just came in from a run around The Park, and blah blah blah much implied about my pecs, which the ladies love. I determined he wasn't the young man in question and politely said that we were not each other's type, and that the young man most certainly does not go for a run.

This evening I arrived home to an e-mail filled with photographs of a over-the-heart-cursive-tattoo guy with plenty of smoldering shirtless photos. Dude, the guy in question has never photographed himself in the mirror with his shirt off. It's not ironic yet.

Ahem. Anyway, this has been quite the learning experience! Attractive, cocky dudes are certain that they are the object of someone's affection as a result of their hottness and awesome tattoos!

Speaking of irony! I await the day future generations wear Nickelback shirts out of irony and not out of pure suburban adoration. I anoint future nieces and nephews with this task.

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAY (Week Twenty-Two)

2010-07-13T10:00:00.000-04:00

Welcome to Week Twenty-Two of Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday! If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

Forgot to save the links this week. If you need them, check the right corner of the edited page.

Item No. 35 (VOID)

2010-07-09T15:00:00.000-04:00

I saw a hot air balloon this weekend on an Independence Day adventure to Baltimore County.

HOT AIR BALLOON!

It was then that I realized that I don't want to take a ride in a hot air balloon.

I don't think I like heights.

I don't like the idea that a bird will crash into the balloon and I'll crash to the ground where I'll meet my untimely death.

I don't like feeling like a basket is all that is between me and the ground.

I didn't even like the Wonder Wheel.

The WONDER WHEEL! The historic, fantastic Wonder Wheel! I gripped the cage with fear and prayed I'd see the ground again under a pleasant pretense. I wished my companions would stop rocking the cage of death I was riding in, and though I have said I will try the cage of death which moves around the wheel, I have no interest in riding in the Wonder Wheel of Imminent Death ever again.

...I really don't want to go for a ride in a hot air balloon.

In fact, if my feet don't leave the ground, unless they're in a plane or a roller coaster, I think I'll be just fine.

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAY (Week Twenty-One)

2010-07-06T10:00:00.012-04:00

Welcome to Week Twenty-One of Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday! If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

Apple Store - m4w - 34 (Montgomery Mall)

Georgetown cupcake guy - w4m - 20 (bethesda)

Fun at the APEX - m4m - 45 (Fells Point)
THIS POST IS NSFW!! (The story is exaggerated if it's true.) Apex Theatre is a porn theater in Baltimore. City Paper wrote about it in January if you need more information.

Met when u got my mail by mistake - Mt. Airy cougar - w4m - 42 (Mt. Airy)

mothers who tell ther kid that the man your dating is her dad - 43 (hoco)

About Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday: I troll the Missed Connections forums (generally Baltimore, DC, and Frederick, and generally m4w as they provide the most guffaws) for hilarious, strange, and modestly creepy grammatically incorrect posts. I print the most interesting, desperate, or strange posts, and copy edit the posts with my trusty red pen. I scan the entries and share them every Tuesday. I do this because I worry my skills will suffer under this winter of discontent and unemployment.

The tag for these thrilling entries is here. I assure you that you will want to read all of the entries.

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAY (Week Twenty)

2010-06-29T10:00:00.037-04:00

Welcome to Week Twenty of Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday! If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

It's nice how I had two errors in last week's post. (Probably more. I didn't look at the scanned copy.) This week's entries are all m4w and from the Frederick, Baltimore, and DC forums.

Local BrewPub this afternoon - m4w - 45 (Frederick)

I was on the phone at starbucks... - m4w - 40 (pikes-ville)
Pikes-ville. Sigh.

We met at the Beer tent at Bonnaroo - m4w - 25

Katey - DC9 - m4w - 38 (DC9)

at depreciation guild show at dc9 - w4m - 24 (dc9)

About Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday: I troll the Missed Connections forums (generally Baltimore, DC, and Frederick, and generally m4w as they provide the most guffaws) for hilarious, strange, and modestly creepy grammatically incorrect posts. I print the most interesting, desperate, or strange posts, and copy edit the posts with my trusty red pen. I scan the entries and share them every Tuesday. I do this because I worry my skills will suffer under this winter of discontent and unemployment.

The tag for these thrilling entries is here. I assure you that you will want to read all of the entries.

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAY (Week Nineteen)

2010-06-22T10:00:00.003-04:00

Welcome to Week Nineteen of Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday! If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

Plenty of saved posts from the great technology drought of 2010. Click the images for direct links to the posts (the posts have probably expired anyway) and additional details.

Item No. 103: Completed

2010-06-21T10:00:00.002-04:00

I wanted to make crème brûlée because it seemed like a dessert that is easy to do but sounds complicated. This is my thing: Magnolia-style cupcakes, ganache, petit fours, etc.

I used this recipe from Martha Stewart:

Ingredients
Serves 8
FOR CUSTARD
4 cups heavy cream
3/4 cups sugar
1 vanilla bean, split lengthwise
7 large egg yolks
1/4 teaspoon coarse salt
FOR TOPPING
3/4 cup sugar

Directions
Prepare oven and baking dishes: Heat oven to 300 degrees. Bring a kettle or pot of water to a boil. Place eight 5-ounce baking dishes in a large roasting pan.
Gently heat cream: In a medium saucepan, combine cream and half the sugar (1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons). Scrape vanilla bean seeds into pan, then add pod. Heat over medium just until mixture starts to bubble around the edge of the pan, 7 to 8 minutes (do not let boil).
Meanwhile, whisk egg yolks: In a large mixing bowl, whisk the egg yolks with remaining sugar and the salt.
Temper eggs: Use ladle to pour a small amount of the hot cream mixture into the egg mixture, then whisk to combine. (This is called tempering and prevents the eggs from curdling.) Add two more ladles of cream mixture, one at a time, whisking to combine after each addition. Gradually whisk in remaining cream mixture. Strain through a fine sieve into a large liquid measuring cup (to remove the vanilla pod and any cooked bits of egg).
Bake: Divide custard evenly among baking dishes. Place pan in oven. Add enough boiling water to come halfway up the sides of the dishes. Bake until custards are just set (they should tremble slightly in center when shaken), 30 to 40 minutes.
Chill: Remove pan from oven. Use tongs to carefully remove dishes from hot-water bath and place on a wire rack for 30 minutes. Then, cover with plastic wrap and chill for at least 2 hours (or up to 3 days) before serving. The custard will finish setting in the refrigerator. If you like, transfer the custards to the freezer 15 minutes before serving to ensure they stay cold after being bruleed (this is especially important if using the broiler).
Caramelize tops and serve: Sprinkle about 1 1/2 tablespoons granulated sugar over each custard. Working with one at a time, pass the flame of the torch in a circular motion 1 to 2 inches above the surface of each custard until the sugar bubbles, turns amber, and forms a smooth surface. Serve immediately.

From The Martha Stewart Show, February 2009

(I'd like to try this recipe from Ina Garten next.)

I'm writing this the night I made the dessert (ed note: dessert made and written about on June 9), so I'm feeling less victorious than I expected. The custard was great, and I'm glad it turned out well. (I was suspicious when I had nothing to strain post-tempering.) But I used too much sugar for the topping, so there was a thin layer of granulated sugar under a thick, slightly burned, candy shell. (So thick that it didn't crack on first spoon impact, and that's the whole point.)

Oh well.

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAYY (Week Eighteen)

2010-06-15T10:00:00.003-04:00

Welcome to Week Eighteen of Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday! If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

Only one entry today! I promise plenty more next week.

Shell RT 9 - m4w - 47

About Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday: I troll the Missed Connections forums (generally Baltimore, DC, and Frederick, and generally m4w as they provide the most guffaws) for hilarious, strange, and modestly creepy grammatically incorrect posts. I print the most interesting, desperate, or strange posts, and copy edit the posts with my trusty red pen. I scan the entries and share them every Tuesday. I do this because I worry my skills will suffer under this winter of discontent and unemployment.

The tag for these thrilling entries is here. I assure you that you will want to read all of the entries.

Monster Jam

2010-06-14T14:11:00.000-04:00

Who's coming?

I'M SERIOUS.

Party Down Clip

2010-06-14T11:52:00.001-04:00

I love this clip from Party Down:

Oh, Henry! That's to say nothing that the surprise(s) has (have) been given away.

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAYY (Week Seventeen)

2010-06-08T10:00:00.002-04:00

Welcome to Week Seventeen of Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday! If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

Maroon Dodge Ram "Commercial Fishermen Help You Live Better" Decal - w4m - 38 (Pasadena)

to the girl in shady grove metro - m4w - 37 (shady grove rockville.)

An apology to the young man at Ram's Head Live 4/29 - 33 (Baltimore)

About Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday: I troll the Missed Connections forums (generally Baltimore, DC, and Frederick, and generally m4w as they provide the most guffaws) for hilarious, strange, and modestly creepy grammatically incorrect posts. I print the most interesting, desperate, or strange posts, and copy edit the posts with my trusty red pen. I scan the entries and share them every Tuesday. I do this because I worry my skills will suffer under this winter of discontent and unemployment.

The tag for these thrilling entries is here. I assure you that you will want to read all of the entries.

Item No. 10: Completed

2010-06-07T10:00:00.034-04:00

I've done a lot of things in New York. I've eaten a Nathan's hot dog (covered in peppers, relish, ketchup, and mustard), walked the Coney Island and Brighton Beach boardwalk, been to a baseball game in the old Yankees Stadium, and seen the top of the Empire State Building. I've been to each borough, toured the Brooklyn Brewerrs, the MET and MOMA, mixed beer at McSorely's, eaten Lombardi's pizza, stepped inside CBGB, and dragged through Rockefeller Center and Times Square several times, but I've never walked the Brooklyn Bridge. Which sounds like something one has to do in New York.

But now I've done it! I should admit right away part of my sense of satisfaction is the act of walking what I perceived a great distance post-accident.

Glad to get that out of the way!

My friend K and I traversed together after an afternoon in Coney Island. We took the train to the edge of Brooklyn and walked through a park to the bridge. It was a nice day. Everything was blue and shimmery, and since we were on a bridge, there was a constant breeze.

K asked for data while we walked, but I didn't have any on hand. (I didn't want to think too hard about construction, either.)

Now that I have the data in front of me, I have facts handy! Completed in 1883, the Brooklyn Bridge was the world's largest suspension bridge until 1903. (Now that honor is bestowed upon Japan's Akashi Kaikyō Bridge.)

The bridge was designed by John A. Roebling and construction began in 1870. Roebling died before the bridge was built, so his son took over. Then his son died—and so did many of its builders—so John's wife stepped in. A week after the bridge opened a stampede on the bridge killed 12 people. (There was a rumor the bridge would collapse. PT Barnum led his elephants over the bridge a year later, disproving the rumor.)

Here's some info from Wikipedia regarding its strength:

Roebling designed a bridge and truss system that was six times as strong as he thought it needed to be. Because of this, the Brooklyn Bridge is still standing when many of the bridges built around the same time have vanished into history and been replaced. This is also in spite of the substitution of inferior quality wire in the cabling supplied by the contractor J. Lloyd Haigh—by the time it was discovered, it was too late to replace the cabling that had already been constructed. Roebling determined that the poorer wire would leave the bridge four rather than six times as strong as necessary, so it was eventually allowed to stand, with the addition of 250 cables. Diagonal cables were installed from the towers to the deck, intended to stiffen the bridge. They turned out to be unnecessary, but were kept for their distinctive beauty.

The approaches were rated poor in 2007 following the Minneapolis bridge collapse. A repainting and repairing effort will begin later this year.

Personally, I think this is one of the prettiest, man-made, things I've ever seen. (Sorry, Empire State building and Salem Sue.)

You can see all of my life list notes (mostly) and accomplishments (six!) here.

Rue McClanahan in 1968's Hollywood After Dark

2010-06-03T18:28:00.001-04:00

Rue McClanahan died today. She's best known, at least in my generation, as Blanche Devereaux on Golden Girls, but Jezebel posted a video of her performing burlesque. Jezebel's [found] video is set to a Pixies song.

I found a less edited version on YouTube. I'm assuming the slightly inflammatory commentary is from Mystery Science Theater 3000 or something like it. I like this version better because it contains more of the original scene from Hollywood After Dark (1968).

Unfortunately I was hoping it would be less against burlesque than it is. I've wanted to learn the art for several years (it's Item No. 11!) but this doesn't help my argument that it's considered cheeky and I wouldn't have to go nude. (It's also more forgiving for chubbier women like fatasses like me.)

We'll miss you, Rue! When I finally accomplish that eleventh goal, I'll think of you.

New York

2010-06-02T11:00:00.001-04:00

I went to New York last week on a "miniature vacation." I took the Bolt Bus from Washington, DC and spent less than 24 cumulative hours eating and sweating my way through the city. I have at least two posts regarding my visit to come, but because I worry about the time that's elapsed since setting foot in Maryland, here are the (poorly taken in the bright sun) photographs:

K met me at the bus stop and we went to Coney Island. It was so bright I couldn't see the display on my camera. That's the drawback to lacking a viewfinder on my point and shoot. Still! This is my fourth? trip to Coney Island and I've never seen it so pretty. (Compare it to winter.) I made him ride the Cyclone! We had lunch on the boardwalk, where no one seems to care about Open Container Laws. (Hey, maybe I should copy edit my blog.) We walked the Brooklyn Bridge, and walked to Chinatown (where I stimulated the economy in Pearl River Mart) and SoHo where we met Becki and her husband for Pizza. At Lombardis! Then we walked really far and went home

The next morning I went to the Museum of Sex, had my first Tim Horton's experience, and saw Lady Elvis.

Yay!

Item No. 8: Completed

2010-06-01T12:00:00.065-04:00

As previously mentioned, I joined the bone marrow registry.

I wanted to add my name and saliva to the registry because I thought it would be important. A person in need might not have a match in his or her family, and though it seems improbable that I'd be the only person in the registry a person needs, I hate to think it would happen and I wouldn't be listed. (I have a lot of these improbable scenarios in my head.)

I say improbable because I'm white, and the registry needs a diverse population. From Be the Match:

Race and ethnicity matter
Because the markers used in matching are inherited, patients are more likely to match someone from their own race or ethnicity. Adding more donors and cord blood units from diverse racial and ethnic backgrounds to the Be The Match Registry increases the likelihood that all patients will find the match they need.

Your heritage can make all the difference. If you are from one of the following communities, you are especially encouraged to join the Be The Match Registry or donate umbilical cord blood:
Black and African American
American Indian and Alaska Native
Asian, including South Asian
Native Hawaiian and other Pacific Islander
Hispanic and Latino
Multiple race

Joining is easy. You go to www.marrow.org and Join the Be The Match Registry. (Be the Match is the name of the National Marrow Donor Program.) Donors need to be between the ages of 18 and 60 and in good health. You fill out the form (name, mailing address, plus payment--so if you were opposed to fill out the Census maybe this isn't for you), make an (optional) donation (in addition to the $100 fee, if it's applied), and wait for your kit. Mine arrived in two days.

The kit contains four swabs. You swab your cheek and send it off in a prepared envelope. And that's it. This was easier than writing a few checks and signing a form for my passport. I don't know why I put off these easy goals.

If you match someone in need, the Registry will contact you. You get to decide whether or not to donate (you're allowed to change your mind), and you are not responsible for the financial burden of participating. If you decide donate, this is what happens:

Q: What is the donation process like?
A: Adult donors may be asked to donate in one of two ways:
Bone marrow donation is a surgical procedure in which liquid marrow is withdrawn from the back of the donor's pelvic bones using special, hollow needles. General or regional anesthesia is always used for this procedure, so donors feel no needle injections and no pain during marrow donation. Most donors feel some pain in their lower back for a few days afterwards.
Peripheral blood cell (PBSC) donation involves removing a donor's blood through a sterile needle in one arm. The blood is passed through a machine that separates out the cells used in transplants. The remaining blood is returned through the other arm.

More questions are answered here.

I received a thank you e-mail a few days after I received my kit. (It was sent with the assumption that I turned it in as soon as I received it. I waited a day because I was tired and cranky when it arrived.) I didn't take any photos, so please accept this as my "proof."

Congratulations, Katherine M.!

You have joined a community of people passionate about saving lives through marrow donation.

[...]

Thank you for joining

Out of a registry of millions, you may be the one a patient needs. You could be the one to save a life.

Thank you for taking the first step,
Be The Match

You can see my Life List here (or here). You can track my progress here.

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAYY (Week Sixteen)

2010-06-01T10:00:00.017-04:00

You guys, I've been doing this for more than sixteen weeks and I still don't have a job. The market is not only worse than we think it is, but this is probably hurting. Still, I must give the people what they want, so here are this week's [loosely] edited posts.

If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

In line together at Downtown SS Chipotle - m4w - 28 (Silver Spring, MD)

Black guy on the top floor View at Waterfront w4m - 28 (sw DC)

College folk - m4w (prince georges community college)

About Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday: I troll the Missed Connections forums (generally Baltimore, DC, and Frederick, and generally m4w as they provide the most guffaws) for hilarious, strange, and modestly creepy grammatically incorrect posts. I print the most interesting, desperate, or strange posts, and copy edit the posts with my trusty red pen. I scan the entries and share them every Tuesday. I do this because I worry my skills will suffer under this winter of discontent and unemployment.

The tag for these thrilling entries is here. I assure you that you will want to read all of the entries.

Not my best work, but you get the point.

2010-05-31T07:00:00.000-04:00

For Jacqueline and Julia, and anyone working today (like me!), I present:

THE MIGHTY TIGUAN

Have you ever seen anything as majestic as the half iguana half tiger that is the tiguan? Move over, rhebok! I found something more graceful! Move over, jaguar, I found something faster and more ferocious! Move over, impala! I found a new animal sharing its name with a lame car to make fun of! Regrettably, the cougar, grizzly bear, crocodile, and Australian-based jellyfishes remain as animals I am seriously afraid of. You guys keep doing what you're doing! You're doing it great!

(How cute is the rhebok? Who is a soft snuggle bunny? You are, rhebok!)

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAYY (Week Fifteen)

2010-05-25T10:00:00.002-04:00

Welcome to Week Twelve of Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday! If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

Having lunch at Checkers (Frederick, Rt 85)

discovery crossing - m4w - 29 (woodsboro pike)

Do you like True Blood? I love True Blood. - m4w - 30 (Silver Spring)

About Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday: I troll the Missed Connections forums (generally Baltimore, DC, and Frederick, and generally m4w as they provide the most guffaws) for hilarious, strange, and modestly creepy grammatically incorrect posts. I print the most interesting, desperate, or strange posts, and copy edit the posts with my trusty red pen. I scan the entries and share them every Tuesday. I do this because I worry my skills will suffer under this winter of discontent and unemployment.

The tag for these thrilling entries is here. I assure you that you will want to read all of the entries.

Regarding No. 8

2010-05-23T21:18:00.001-04:00

One of the items on my "life list" was to submit my DNA to the bone marrow registry. I ordered a kit last week, and the fee was waived. The kit fee was waived in 2008 in May, so it's possible that the fee is waived again this year, too. You can find more about the process and fees and swabs and whatnot here.

I'll have more later (a general, "Yay that was easy" post), but if there's some sort of deal (I can't confirm anything), and you were thinking of registering, you might want to do it now. (Especially if you'd rather spend your money on a trip to New York to visit your best friend and pay an $18 admission free even though you're used to free museums in the nation's capital, but oh em gee, isn't it a more worthy cause to pay a kit fee? Yeah, it is.)

Ahem. I have priorities! Really!

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAY (Week Fourteen)

2010-05-18T10:00:00.027-04:00

Welcome to May's first Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday! If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

This week there are three connections. I promised more, but I thought it would be better to parsel these out evenly, so as to give content next week...and the following week...and so on. Enjoy!

who is the smoking hot mail carrier in jefferson - m4w (jefferson burbs)

Lindsay at O's game - m4w - 31 (Baltimore)

The the voluptuous green/blonde hair goth girl in Walgreens Tues Night - m4w (Glen Burnie Walgreens)

About Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday: I troll the Missed Connections forums (generally Baltimore, DC, and Frederick, and generally m4w as they provide the most guffaws) for hilarious, strange, and modestly creepy grammatically incorrect posts. I print the most interesting, desperate, or strange posts, and copy edit the posts with my trusty red pen. I scan the entries and share them every Tuesday. I do this because I worry my skills will suffer under this winter of discontent and unemployment.

The tag for these thrilling entries is here. I assure you that you will want to read all of the entries.

Item No. 109: Completed

2010-05-17T10:00:00.001-04:00

...I added this to my list because I knew it needed to be done and hoped that by adding it, and finishing it, I could pretend I had accomplished something.

I'm not sure I feel accomplished. I just feel tired. Technically speaking, Item No. 109 is completed. I threw a yard sale. I just didn't sell anything, and having done all of that hard work, I feel betrayed.

THE BACKGROUND
My town hosts a day every year in the spring when its residents can haul out its junk and sell that junk without a permit. We missed out on it last year, and I bemoaned our loss because the basement is full of junk I don't think we need anymore. I was worried most of it was mine. (It wasn't.)

I cleaned out every room in the house. (Except my parents'. That's not my business, you know?) I hauled it upstairs, downstairs, and upstairs and downstairs again. I scrubbed clean every corner, and on Friday, with my Aunt's assistance, we priced everything and prepared for the sale.

THE SALE

Almost Nothing sold.

A talking bear went to the little girl next door. A lava lamp went with an old lady, who promptly dropped it on our driveway. A scooter, a tennis racket, and a few odds and ends went home with strangers. The Department 56 houses, Snowbabies, beanie babies, dress up clothes, the typewriter, and other collectibles were untouched.

It was crap, but it was quality crap, so I'm a little disappointed. At noon, we loaded the crap in to two cars and drove my car into down, where I unloaded the crap (AGAIN) at Goodwill. Just thinking about the work and lack of reward makes me yearn for a drink.

Despite having exhumed the crap, my parents' house is still full of crap. I don't want to host a yard sale ever again, and I'm not interesting in cleaning and decluttering their house anymore, either. I'm sorry, Mom and Dad, but when you die (in several decades) I have no interest in going through your junk, OK. I'm going to take what I want and hire a crew to do the rest. I don't know how I'll pay for it, but thinking of the way our house with leftover yard sale ephemera makes me want to hurl.

FOUND (Digital Love Note Edition)

2010-05-16T11:45:00.000-04:00

When my parents moved from the small house up the street to the one we live in now, my mom tossed her old love letters. My dad said something stupid like, "You married me. You don't need those!" She shrugged and threw them away. I was one, and when I hit double digits, I wanted to know what they said. I vowed I'd never throw out a love letter.

I've only sort of done that. Don't worry! I'm not married to anyone. And I don't have any real love letters. I have received nary a handwritten sweet nothing delivered with a stamp. Instead I have, stored in the ether of the Internet, poorly written flirtatious e-mails, blog comments, private messages, and instant messenger conversations. I've been locked out of an old e-mail account, losing a decade's worth of petty accusations, daily e-mails, and a tome's worth of complaints. I've lost the Internet survey a boyfriend sent wherein he wrote he was "listening" to "Wish You Were Here" by Incubus. (It made my heart flutter.) I've lost the e-mail a would-be paramour wrote that he thought of me at work. (I swooned so hard I almost fainted.)

I realized this last week when I found—with great surprise—that I had printed an AOL Instant Messenger conversation (really) between a young man and I from when I was in high school. I'd been cleaning the house for a garage sale (more on that tomorrow) when I found the the papers folded and stuffed at the bottom of a box, chronicling several nights' worth of conversations.

If you had asked me that morning to describe my relationship with the young man, or lack of, I'd turn red-faced and try to explain that I was really young and misinterpreted generosity as standard heterosexual mating signals. I've been wallowing in shame since our falling out almost seven years ago, and even though the relationship was fairly lackluster, he was really cute, I really liked him, and I've been very embarrassed since I was 17. This young man holds the dubious distinction as the first boy who broke my heart, and I felt stupid and betrayed—by myself, mostly—when he said, "I'm sorry, but I've started seeing someone else." It was a bit of a tailspin, and my overreaction is a big part of the reason I've felt ashamed about our short friendship.

Until now. All of my feelings about this young man, who was ridiculously good looking, were validated in the wadded up print outs. He flirted, bestowed compliments, and said things like, "I can't wait to come home and call you later." And, "I can't wait to see you again." He called me stupid pet names, which I hate, but indicated that he liked me. He liked me more than a friend or kid sister, and the weight of seven years of shame has been lifted.

It feels nice.

GOD SAYS NO KISSING

2010-05-15T11:59:00.000-04:00

Shockingly, this No Kissing crap was never pushed on me in Catholic School. (To be fair, boys could do anything but girls couldn't. So. That would explain why. And this video isn't very Catholic anyway.)

Via Feministing!

TGITF (Thank Goodness It's Taco Friday)

2010-05-14T08:12:00.000-04:00

Happy Friday! I have a yard sale tomorrow. Please come and spend cash on stuff you don't need. Like beanie babies! And Dept. 56 houses! And at least one camera lens. And a lava lamp!

Things That Have Been "Explained" To Me In The Last 48 Hours

2010-05-06T17:42:00.002-04:00

Good thing, too! I'm just a dumb girl, don't you know. I can't believe I got through life without these valuable explanations.

Photography and its history
Architecture
Downtown Frederick
And how, did you know?!, people live in apartments over those quaint little shops!
And how Downtown Frederick is worthless without High Rises
How public transportation works
And what the Purple Line really is
And what it was supposed to be
And what the Silver Line is
And that it is not so good
That Salt Lake City, Utah is very liberal! Just like New York! It has bikes lanes just like Portland and great transportation and everything is open all night and...
And its politicians are lovely and open-minded
And when they tried to close down all-ages shows in the early '00s that was a GOOD thing
What coins are REALLY made out of
How to invest in gold
How to invest
Why the euro is going to crash
Why this country is so screwed up
How to Eat Right
And why it's important
And and and and and...

I wonder how I got through life so long without this information!

FOUND

2010-05-03T15:01:00.002-04:00

I found the following letter (printed e-mail, really) in my parents' basement. It was the first letter—that I recall—that was received as the result of a negative review. I'm glad I printed the letter, because it was sent to an account that has since been closed due to inactivity (oops). The review in question was Something Corporate's 2003 North. (Coincidentally, I found a signed CD booklet in the basement today, too! I have no idea where the CD is.)

From: "Something Corporate"
To: [redacted]
Subject: So Co Article
Date: Wed, 17 Mar 2004 01:15:13 +0000

Hi Katherine,
I would like to thank you for [your articles]. It was awesome to see that you had it published in both your school paper and your local paper. I noticed that you didn't care for this album as much as So Co's prior releases — I think you made a number of interesting and insightful points. I'm assuming you're a SoCo fan since you went out of the way to write it, and so I was wondering why you decided to write such a negative review for others to see. Please let me know.

Thanks,
[redacted]

Ah, memories.

Oops

2010-05-02T14:33:00.004-04:00

While technical difficulties at home remain, I have been bringing the week's Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday posts to the dark room where I can scan the entries and make the post on time. Last night I emptied out my dark room bag, and accidentally left this week's Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday at home! ...So there will be no Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday this week. The series will return in two weeks. (And perhaps with bonus content!)

Amy March will never get in trouble at school again!

2010-05-01T09:00:00.001-04:00

I like to fantasize about my future grownup life. I'm an adult now, but I don't feel like I'm there yet. (For starters, I do not have a dog. Even though one happily wandered into my front yard today while I was working on photography, and it tried to come inside.) I don't dream about my next job (it's too depressing), but I imagine paint colors and home offices, building a dark room, and of having an avocado tree in the back yard. (I also dream that I'll go my whole adult life without a mortgage or yard work. HA HA HA HA HA.)

My future grownup life has fruit trees in it. Knowing that San Francisco is a walking tour of free fruit and warmer climates in general allow for perfect homes with fruit trees in the foyer has exacerbated my fascination with growing indoor fruit. Can you imagine what it must be like to pass a dozen lemon trees every time you head for the front door every morning/when you go to get the mail/when you realize at 1 a.m. you left your cell phone in your car again? I hoped they could be a side effect to never having to shovel 13 inches of snow in one afternoon again, but I was wrong, because you can own an indoor lemon tree in a state with two blizzards in one winter if you put that indoor lemon tree in front of a window.

It just so happens that my parents' house, where I live rent free, teach them about technology and pop culture, make them cookies, ice, vacuum, dust, and stock Coca-Colas in the freezer, has windows that get plenty of sun. I decided I could justify spending $60 for a plant by calling it a birthday present for myself (I might prefer to ignore my birthday with the exception of eating cake with my family, but this sort of behavior is perfectly fine), since I read that it takes a year for a tree to provide fruit, and my birthday is in the fall.

But yesterday I found a lemon tree for a fraction of the price the trees usually cost, and it was next to a lime tree, and some of the trees it arrived with had arrived with fruit. So I bought both of them, at a combined price still less than the average lemon tree. When I wheeled them out of the greenhouse, I began to fantasize about my winter limes and lemons: sorbets, cocktails, Meyer lemon meringue pies, curds, preserved lemons! Take that seasonal affective disorder (assuming I don't kill my trees—the man at the store accidentally killed his, but the woman in line had hers for twenty years, and I haven't killed anything at home yet).

Happy (very very early) birthday to me!

COPY EDIT CRAIGSLIST TUESDAY (Week Thirteen)

2010-04-27T10:00:00.003-04:00

Welcome to Week Twelve of Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday! If this is your first Tuesday reading my edits to Craigslist's Missed Connections forum, additional information is below.

This week there are four connections. They are kind of icky. In the interest of honesty, I picked the Baltimore posts because that's where I drank in college.

Rec Room - m4w - 26 (Towson)

black stretch pants and white shirt at ottobar - m4w - 24 (baltimore)

Michaels Arts and Crafts - Connecticut and Georgia Ave - m4w - 26 (Silver Spring MD)

You stuck my flash drive in your vagina - m4w - 25 (philadelphia)
(Via Christina)

About Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday: I troll the Missed Connections forums (generally Baltimore, DC, and Frederick, and generally m4w as they provide the most guffaws) for hilarious, strange, and modestly creepy grammatically incorrect posts. I print the most interesting, desperate, or strange posts, and copy edit the posts with my trusty red pen. I scan the entries and share them every Tuesday. I do this because I worry my skills will suffer under this winter of discontent and unemployment.

The tag for these thrilling entries is here. I assure you that you will want to read all of the entries.

Some Notes

2010-04-25T16:47:00.003-04:00

A. It turns out that if someone asks your opinion, they'd much rather hear yours than his, hers, or theirs. (Sometimes a group could ask, right? Like, the Presidential Cabinet might ask.) Even if you don't know what his, her, or their opinion is, they get totally mad with you, even when you say it very nicely. I rarely provide the right answer. At this point, you'd think people would stop asking.

A1. I had a dream once I was an assassin for the President. I had watched Kill Bill Vol. I before I went to bed. After completing various tasks in a warehouse, I sat down with Rahm Emmanuel, Barack Obama, and Michelle Obama, who asked how to "turn the country around." I said Universal Health Care, Equal Pay, and Gay in the Military. Obama nodded, took some notes, and said, "I'll do that."

A2. I had a dream this week that I had recently developed super powers (I was very tall and grew a suit of armor) and was asked by Tony Stark to work with him on...defeating someone? I don't know. I had to go to Target before meeting with him and kept whispering, "We have to finish, I need to meet with Ironman later."

B. My mom and I were driving home yesterday when we passed a church with a large bus in it. The bus was black and said "AMERICAN FUNERALS" and "TOURING EXHIBIT" on it, so naturally she zipped into the lot and dragged me inside, where I could nitpick some grammatical and factual errors regarding celebrity deaths. (I just finished reading this.) In exchange for withstanding the exhibit I made her watch the Six Feet Under pilot, and guess who is obsessed with the Fisher family?

Bonus: The night before I taught her how to play Mario Kart on the Wii, and she's really into that too. I may have someone to practice with before my sister visits in the fall.

C. I'll be teaching area citizens how to be enumerators every night this week for the U.S. Census Bureau. So if you didn't send in your census, and someone comes to your door, you'll be nice, right? You will? Good.

D. I think Arizona is acting like a complete shithead right now. SB1070 is a disgrace. I had a conversation earlier this week with a co-worker about Japanese Internment Camps. She had read (or seen?) a Tea Bagger on TV claiming that the Census was used to "round up the Japanese." (UGH.) Guess who loooooves Arizona's SB1070? The Tea Baggers! They love old school fascism but hate American fascism when it's convenient. Nut bags.

D1. By the way, you information is safe. It's considered private, and there are serious repercussions for the smallest infraction for a census worker.
D2. And yes! You are legally obligated to answer the census. Yes, it's in the Constitution.

E. Maybe he should cook something other than eggs and bacon. I don't want to be with someone who wouldn't go to an event for me, and I don't want to be with someone who gets mad that he might have to make his own dinner, and I definitely can't stand to be with anyone who "doesn't want" me to do something. The married men in my life—my dad and my brothers-in-law—would say, "You want to do that? OK." (Realistically, a dude would point out my proclivity toward clumsiness and my lack of knee meat, but otherwise, I expect him out there with signs.) I wonder if he does Fantasy Sports or bowling. I should probably let it go: she won.

That's all I have for now. See you Tuesday for another rousing installment of Copy Edit Craigslist Tuesday!

Amber on Parenthood

2010-04-24T23:31:00.003-04:00

The problem with Parenthood, NBC's second television series based on the 1989 film, is that it has only 40 minutes to devote to 10 main characters and their families. I don't usually mind large casts with many story lines. I like The Wire, and Six Feet Under, and I wish Justified had more going on, because it seems like it could get really fun and really crazy fast.

Parenthood follows the Braverman family: parents Zeek and Camille, their children, and grandchildren. With that many characters, it's hard to give everyone equal exposure week-to-week, but I was particularly happy when Mae Whitman's Amber was given one great scene in an episode that otherwise pushed her into the background.

Amber is a moody, errant teenager, but she's also smart and sometimes very mature. She's also surrounded by smart strong women, which I mention because it's seemingly rare in a Bella Swan world. I was already thrilled to have Whitman on TV—I loved her in Arrested Development, but I recall State of Grace with greater fondness—but Amber's realization that her One True Love is a total dunce, her final realization that she's worth more was deeply gratifying. Amber sends her boyfriend packing because he isn't smart enough for her. Finally! A smart! Teenager! I love that she isn't bowed over by stupid boys. (Her cousin Hattie is also smart, but seemingly simple-minded, and stupidly in love with her annoying boyfriend. Oh, Hattie! You can do better.)

I hope we see more of this Amber in season one. She's more complex than what I'm used to, and I'm rooting for her.

Here are some bonus clips of Whitman with Alia Shawkat in State of Grace. This isn't on DVD yet, which is absolutely ridiculous: